Kadaj: Emo Chronicles
by princess454
Summary: [Advent Children] All I can say is that this is the day to day life of Kadaj as he deals with family and high school. Much better summary inside. Please read! COMPLETE. Review so I know I did a good job! XD
1. Chapter 1

Summary Continued: You all know Kadaj. He's one of the mains from the ever popular Final Fantasy movie, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children. You know what I want you to do? I want you to forget the Kadaj you saw in that film. Forget him completely. Because here comes a new one, fresh off the oven in my imaginary house, set a top the imaginary hill, taking part in the imaginary world, in my head. The Kadaj featured in this fan-fiction is a teenage tormented soul. To put it in blunt terms, some of you might see him as an Emo (Emo: Short for emotional. A fad taking part in kids these days. I don't know the exact description however, so if you're still puzzled, and yearn to know what it is, simply look it up) . His life is a total mess. Or so he claims. His older brother makes him and his other brothers call him Father. You might know his Father. He goes by the name of Sephiroth and has real long silver hair. Ring a bell? It should. Whoever in this world doesn't have a clue who Sephiroth is, seriously should go on some kind of medication. Anyway, back to the original summary. Kadaj lives with his "Father" of his, along with three other brothers. The first one is Loz. Loz is the athlete of the family. He gets straight A's. He's always throwing the best parties. JENOVA enhanced women swoon over him. Lucky guy. Next is Yazoo. Yazoo has a feminine quality about him, even though he's the funniest, coolest, most awesome brother a guy could have. Sephi-or I mean Father is always calling him a homosexual. The sexuality abuse thrown frequently against Yazoo hurts pretty deep, but he never shows it. The truth is Yazoo IS homosexual, or well, he can be. He says he's bisexual. Then last and least, is Cloud. He barely lives with them. He's always coming and going, and nobody ever has a clue what he does or where he goes. So really there's nothing to say about him. If Kadaj's family wasn't screwed up enough, he has to attend high school, which after his family, is the next thing on his hate list. He hates every class except lunch and sometimes art. It depends. There he can either sleep or draw, so its ok sometimes. He used to like English when they were studying poetry, but then it moved on to something else. Kadaj isn't too happy about that. Along with some other stuff and people, there are plenty of occupants on Kadaj's hate list as well as on his suck worthy life. Hey I have an idea. Let's read on about this tormented lifestyle of his shall we? Tragedy is entertaining. So are mischievous bright green eyed and silver haired high school boys. This is one Final Fantasy teenage drama you won't wanna miss.

And now, finally presenting, after that ridiculously long summary...

Kadaj: Emo Chronicles

A Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children Parody Fan-Fiction

By Princess454

Hosted by: Princess Productions (Just kidding. I don't have my own company. Yet...)

♡♡

I rolled out of the beat up mattress I was laying upon on my floor. It was bumpy in certain places, ripped and stabbed and various places, and had a number of splotches in some places as well. It wasn't a prince's four poster bed, but it did for me. I never slept anyway. When I rolled out of it just now, I didn't roll out of it after waking up. I had been staring at my ceiling. But my alarm clock rang. It was time to get ready for hell. Some call it high school. It was a torture chamber, and I don't know why I'm being forced into it. I haven't done harm to anyone. If whoever it was that invented high school wants to fix up my character, then they're thinking the wrong idea. I was an innocent, happy thinking youth before coming into high school. Now all it does is make me _want_ to go out and kill someone. The effects are reversed you see. But I didn't have time to ponder on it. It shouldn't even deserve to be pondered on.

I got up and kicked the mattress aside. I picked up a random playing card next to my foot. I had found it yesterday whilst walking home. Then I had thought it was pretty. Now it was revolting. You see, it was a Queen card, and when I found it, it reminded me of someone. But now that I'm being forced to once again go to this 'high school' I got mad. However, now that I bring this person up, I'm not too mad. Still, I like to rip things. I ripped the card in half. Seconds later I was sad I did. I sniffed and a warm tear ran down my cheek. I carefully held the now two pieced playing card in my hands, like I was holding an injured little bird. I placed it gently on the only other furniture in my room, a scratched and old dresser. I would tend to it later.

The heavy stomping of boots told me I should get to breakfast before I got my ass kicked. And when that happened it hurt. More then on the outside. You see, my Father is abusive. He only has eyes for Mother and my other brother Loz. My other brother, Yazoo, has fallen to his abusive ways as well. But it was a different way then mine. I won't explain now. When I get into that I tend to cry. I don't wanna cry infront of Father. He'll call me a sensitive fag again.

♡♡

I pushed one of the chairs back, making a loud disturbing sound. It didn't harm anyone. Nobody was in here except for Mother. Then again, she's always in the dining room. A few months ago Father took her out of her special room for Thanksgiving, and placed her on the table. Something went wrong so now she's extra fragile. We're all scared to move her incase she falls apart. So here she resides.

"Good morning Mother," I greeted quietly. I liked Mother. She was quiet like me. Even though her love was silent, I knew it was there. I didn't expect an answer of course so I went ahead and sat down, glaring at the box of cereal. That wasn't my usual cereal. This one was some disgusting kind with natural fruits. Who in their right mind would eat that.

"Father bought it and threw out all the other cereal. He says the family is going on an official diet," Yazoo suddenly explained, entering the room. My sore and bloodshot eyes traveled from the tabletop to him, in a rare motion in my part. I usually kept my eyes down.

Yazoo was wearing grey cashmere pajama bottoms, and nothing else. His topless upper body was the attractive kind of pale, while my skin was the sickly kind. Yazoo eats nothing but fruit so that might be why, but I'm no doctor. His long silver hair was perfectly combed, even though he had just woken up. He can look good in all situations. I think he knows this because he is almost never depressed. He walked forward into the kitchen, towards the fruit basket and picked out a banana. His cashmere pajama pants made a soft swishing noise. I've actually tried them on once, because I was sick of hearing rich people always talk highly about cashmere, so I was curious. It was a deadly soft sensation that I hope to never feel again. He however really likes them. I think his girlfriend from France sent it to him. Yazoo has a total of five girlfriends at the moment, and I've lost count on how many boyfriends he has. Yes, he's bisexual, and I think it's the coolest thing ever. Everything about Yazoo was cool. Two of those girlfriends are out of state, one is altogether out of this country, and two actually go to the same high school we do. I wonder how he pulls it off. Actually, I don't really mind if I do know or not know, because I wouldn't have any use of that information. I don't really want any girlfriends. Don't get me wrong, I'm not like _that_, I'm into girls alright. I just don't like them. They're boring and annoying. Plus the fact that they're all the same. They're always complaining on why guys don't like them, and this and that. They think its because of their weight, their hair, something else ridiculous like that. I'm into originality. But I think the other boys give the wrong message. Then again, I hate them too. I don't like my school that much, their educational system, as well as the inhabitants.

On the whole 'wondering how Yazoo pulls the girlfriend thing off' I also don't mind that I don't know because it just adds another mysterious layer to Yazoo. Mystery is cool. Therefore Yazoo is even more cool for having it. Yazoo's sexuality is a touchy subject in my family because its very well hidden and secret. That lucky bastard, how mysterious can he get? He's already cool. I wish I had some mystery to me, but somehow, no matter how hard I try, everyone can tell right away how I'm like. I guess I'm too obvious. Anyway, sometimes I feel bad for Yazoo because Father would literally kill him if he found out. Worse Yazoo is more on the homo side then the straight side. I think this because he always describes some of his boyfriends elaborately, and with passion. However he doesn't really mind his girlfriends. He treats them very well for a guy who doesn't care for them. He loves women, but to him they're like pets. He'll leave them outside until he wants them, then let them back in. It all depends on how he's feeling, and how the girl is. The bad thing about Yazoo is that he can easily get bored, and since he only uses girls for entertainment, then that's how we get on the whole Yazoo girlfriend committee thing. I think there's enough of them to start a committee anyway.

Now that I think about it, there's a lot of mystery to my brothers. More then there should be. I'm the only one without mystery, so I don't count. I'll get to Loz and Cloud later. Since Yazoo is here and all, he's the main subject. I love talking about Yazoo. He's my role model. He's the one brother I'll do anything for. He's that cool. But all this brotherly love turns to hate faster than anything. Sometimes I'll just hate him for no reason, just so I can hate him. I hate loving him. That's what mostly gets me pissed off.

"Father knew you'd get mad over the cereal." Yazoo broke in to my thoughts. I blinked. The cereal. Father threw out my cereal. I started to cry silently.

"That was my favorite cereal...did he even ASK me if I wanted to go on some stupid diet?" I snapped. Not that I even needed it. I'm sickly skinny. I barely eat.

Yazoo shrugged. "You know how he is. He's the boss. Don't let him get you down, ok?" Yazoo trooped out of the room, tossing his banana peel squarely into the trash over his shoulder. He wasn't even looking. I hate him.

Plus, he should talk. He acts like he knows all about Father and they're best buddies. Any day I could go up to Father and tell him all of Yazoo's love secrets. Then again, nobody would believe me, but I still could. Then again I don't want to move again. I sort of liked this town. I'll get into why I like it later. You see, when Father gets really mad, he can sometimes go crazy. He goes crazy mostly when we break his rules. Once again I feel bad for Yazoo, and would feel worse if I ever did spill his secret. Dating was a touchy subject with Father. He didn't approve. As far as he was concerned, we were all going to school and getting good grades, and ignoring the opposite sex completely. He was so wrong I sometimes laughed when thinking about it. He solemnly states that we should hold no room in our hearts for no other female than Mother. After finding out about an old girlfriend of Loz's back in our last town, he ended up setting our house on fire. See what I mean? I have to live with this crazy man. I don't even wanna talk about what he did to Cloud's old girlfriend too. Actually, to both of Cloud's old girlfriends. I feel sorry for both of them. At least one's still alive. Oops. I didn't say anything. Anyway, I have nightmares sometimes, just imagining what he'd do if he ever caught Yazoo. But Yazoo was always careful. Maybe I shouldn't blackmail him after all. Loz wasn't as careful and deserved what happened last time. Yet he still continues having a little committee of girls himself. I hate him too.

♡♡

I ended up not having breakfast. It wasn't a big deal. The only person I spoke too today was Yazoo and Mother. Cloud was gone as usual, Loz always wakes up late, and Father was gone. Don't ask me where Cloud or Father go, they never talk about it. Cloud never talks period. He's more mysterious then Yazoo. I wonder how everyone can pull that off and I can't. It seriously got me mad.

I have to take the bus to school. I hate it. I hated the sight and everyone in it. I was the only high schooler who actually took this god damn yellow bus. I always had to sit next to snotty kids eating crayons and their own homework. I got in trouble once when I couldn't take it one day and actually threatened this kid. Big deal, I said I'd kill him if he ever poked me again. It's not like I was actually going to do it...

I wasn't paying attention when the bus came. I was sitting on the ground, reading a really good book. It was mostly about death, but there was some love in it too. I kinda skipped that chapter though. Anyway, the bus pulled away and drove on without me. This has happened before. When I finally looked up from my reading and checked my watch I was late. I had to walk to school and would be even more late. At least I got to skip algebra. However, I was still miserable. The cereal, now the bus. Today wasn't going to be fun. I could already tell.

♡♡

When I came to the front of my school, I surprisingly saw Loz there, leaning against a wall smoking a cigarette. I wish I could smoke. I wish I was cool like Yazoo and Loz. Actually, I wish I had never been born, but I usually think about that later.

"Little bro. Took you long enough," Loz slurred when I approached him. Not only was he smoking but he was totally baked. Stoned. I wondered why he was like this so early in the day. You see, Loz is the athlete. He's been in every team of every sport some time or other. But due to his strong build, he prefers and majors in football. He's one of the star players. He gets the girls due to that. His buddies and him are stoners though. But if I were Loz, I'd be doing the same thing. Father stresses him a lot to get good grades and win games. The lucky bastard does both.

"Why are you here?" I wondered menacingly. He was making me even more late. Not that I cared. Not that anyone cared.

"I lied to get out here and have a quick smoke. Someone told me you weren't on the bus either, so I decided to wait up for ya, and make sure you were ok." He took a long drag on his cigarette then flicked it away. He blew the smoke in my face, making my eyes burn more then they usually do.

"Do not babysit me." I glared at him once the smoke cleared, then slouched inside. I hated having people worry about me. I didn't like people feeling sorry for me either. When I went inside my English class, nobody even noticed me come in. Well, except for one person. But I'll get to her later.

When the bell rang my teacher asked me to come up to the desk. I didn't want too and I was tempted to just walk off and pretend I didn't hear her. But I decided too anyway, not wanting to get detention. Today was going wrong enough.

"You were late. Where were you?" She asked sternly, in a fake motherly voice. _Why should I tell you? You don't care, remember_? I thought miserably.

"I missed my bus. I walked to school." I swiped away at my bangs, trying to see how she was reacting. My bangs were always in my eyes, but I liked it that way. That way, nobody could see my bloodshot eyes from not sleeping, and how they were red around the edges from crying.

"You have brother that's a Junior, and a brother that's a Senior, and one whose long since left school. There's also your father. And your mother? Look how many people could have given you a ride to school," She said shaking her head. "Didn't you think of that?"

Hadn't she realized that maybe I would've thought about that, IF I didn't already know they couldn't get me a ride? Geez, woman.

"Both my brothers Yazoo and Loz wouldn't be able to give me a ride. My father is out, my Mother doesn't drive, and my oldest brother is gone away in college across the country," I lied. Well, mostly lied. "I have to go." Before she could say anything I left that horrid room. Whenever teachers wanted to talk to me, I always ended up at my stupid counselor's office. That crack head doesn't understand me at all. And he never will either.

I barely use my locker because I keep no books or binders. But today, I realized I forgot my jacket in there, and I wanted to wear it. I wear the same clothes everyday, but I do wash them. When people prod enough on why I don't wear different clothes, I usually end up telling them my house got burned to the ground, along with everything else I owned. That was partially the truth anyway.

When I opened my locker a letter fell out. My heart jumped. I don't get socially contacted very often. I hoped it wasn't a beat up letter, announcing the time and place where some loser Seniors were going to beat me up. That hasn't happened in a month though.

When I opened the letter, I found that it was written in the unique style of a girl's hand. Small and unreadable. _Damn it_, I thought as I struggled to make out what was written. Suddenly I got shoved against my locker.

"Loser's got a love letter!" A voice sneered. I turned around to find three guys. They usually mocked me sometimes. I don't know why. I don't know them or have ever spoken to them. Someone told me once that they were rivals of Loz, so they were getting revenge by making fun of me. I don't really know or care. I waited until they went away.

"Lemme read it, freak," Another one demanded, reaching for the letter. I gripped it tightly and wouldn't in a chance in hell let him have it.

"Watch out Johnny! His mommy might come over here and get mad at you!" The first one sneered. They laughed.

"Is mommy gonna come and save you, momma's boy?" One asked. "Don't cry now." They shoved me again but finally left. Bastards. I quickly returned to the letter, ignoring that whole interruption. I was often ridiculed over Mother. However, I didn't pay any mind to it.

All I could make out of the letter was that she wanted to find out why I was late and if I wanted to talk. She planned on meeting me somewhere after school. I crushed the letter in my hands and hid it in my pocket. Unfortunately, I had no intention to talk about anything to anyone. And I wasn't meeting her after school.

♡♡

School was finally over with. I don't always go straight home. When I left class, I left quickly so nobody would stop me. I ran over to the nearest 7 Eleven and pulled out some change from my back pocket. I bought a candy bar, starved. I walked outside, peeling the wrapper gently, and savoring the taste. I thought about going to the book store. I walked there but didn't go in. I didn't feel like reading. I felt like writing. From inside my jacket pocket, I pulled out my small notebook. I write notes on future poems I should write. I spotted the note from yesterday, noting the playing card. It was ripped in two on top of my dresser. I ran home and instantly locked myself in my room. I started my poem, on the playing card. I didn't touch it or bother with it yet though. I can't make up my mind whether I hate it or like it. It's kinda like how I feel about someone...but I'll get to that later.

I was forced to come to dinner hours later. I saw Loz, already stuffing his face when I came in. Getting stoned a lot gives you a big appetite I suppose. I saw Yazoo gracefully eat his food, bit by bit, biding his time. He was elegant in everything he did. Father was talking to Mother while eating, and apparently he ignored the buzzing that came from her. When I sat down I saw that the buzzing was because there were all these flies flying around her. I wished to fan them away but Father was busy with Mother at the moment. I couldn't eat partly because I wasn't hungry and partly because Mother was starting to smell bad again. Nobody ever noticed.

Suddenly, Father turned to me, and I almost fell out of my seat. I hate it when he does that.

"You were late today. Why?" He demanded angrily, stabbing a chicken leg. I gulped.

"I missed my bus."

"Again? How hard is it to stand at a corner, wait, and get on a bus when it pulls over? Tell me. Is it that hard?" Father growled. I looked down at my untouched place miserably.

"Don't tell me you were writing your stupid poetry. Or reading your depressing books."

"My poetry isn't stupid! And I like reading those books!"

"Please, they aren't educational in the least. They're just turning you into some dark animal. You never eat, you never talk, all you do is lock yourself up all day in your room the minute you get home. You blast that stupid loud music. Do you think the rest of us LIKE listening to some tattooed punks scream about killing themselves?" Father continued. I tried to keep calm. I hated it so much when he put the spotlight on me like this. I could feel everyone watching me. I didn't argue with him, because it was pointless. Father never listened and he always had to have his way. He didn't understand me either. Nobody did.

"And another thing. Your grades are slipping. I think-," Father started yet again, when suddenly the door slammed open. We all looked up to see who it was.

Cloud came in, his boots making heavy step sounds on the floor. His gaze glared over us all and he silently took a seat.

"And you," Father started in on Cloud, "Where were YOU Mister?"

"Out."

"Doing what?"

"Stuff."

"And what are you doing now? You think you can just waltz in here and eat dinner with us like that?" Father wondered angrily. He was really on edge today. Actually, he always was.

As for Cloud, he merely picked up his plate and left for his room. There was a moment of silence. I didn't understand Cloud. Yet I wished I had his guts. You had to be truly insane to just ignore Father like that and walk out of the room while he was still talking. Cloud had mystery, and he had guts.

The silence was broken as a squashing sound could be heard. Mother's arm fell off again.

♡♡

I lay against the wall in my room, listening to my loud suicidal music. I was staring at the playing card, the Queen elegant in her bright robes. I added some stuff to my poem. I sub consciously fingered the letter in my pocket. I wondered if she was mad at me for not meeting her after school. I wondered how I would face her tomorrow. Hopefully she would be mad, and not worried. I hated it when girls got worried and all motherly. It just made you feel like a child. But then again, I wouldn't have much in experience in that, now would I.

Things will change tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

You may have noticed that I hate quite a lot of things. But there's something in this world that I hate _so much_ I'm willing to sell my soul for it to be vanished forever.

Show and Tell Day.

What kind of an_ idiot_ invented that activity? And why do I, a high school student, still have to take part in it?

Turns out it was Show and Tell today. I sat back in my desk miserably, watching little Mary Jones babble on about her grandmother's scarf, or Jimmy Waldorf about the scar he got last weekend.

How pathetic.

I tried to think of something to share while my turn was slowly coming. Should I share about how Loz made a gigantic hole in my wall yesterday, playing football with his buddies? Now when I have to go sleep, bugs and ravage raccoons share my bed with me. Before I already didn't sleep much. Now I can't sleep period. Or should I give in full exact detail how I accidentally tripped on one of Mother's life support chords, almost causing her to topple over and break into a million pieces, and for my punishment all I could eat was prune cereal? Yes, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Before I already didn't eat much. Now every time my small stomach churns for food, I have to look to prune cereal for salvation. Should I share even more stories of my miserable life, the screwed up ideals of my family? How I don't have a grandmother to make ME a scarf, and how while Jimmy Waldorf gets a scar last weekend, I get one everyday?

Perhaps. Then again I don't wish to fill their heads with such tragedy. I'm not that nice.

"Kadaj, it's your turn," Mrs. Something or other said from the front. I didn't move.

"I think he's dead!" Someone jeered. Laughter rippled through my ears.

"Kadaj, did you not hear me? It's time for your Show and Tell."

I thought of giving her the middle finger, and replying, "Show and Tell _this_, bitch!" But I didn't. I walked up to the front of the classroom and stood there. I didn't say anything.

"What is it that you have to share with us Kadaj?" Mrs. Pain in the ass asked sweetly. I stiffly turned my head towards her but didn't answer.

"Hey Mrs. Stroganauff, can I ask Kadaj a question?" Some kid asked, waving his hand back and forth through the air.

"Uh...sure?"

"Hey Kadaj, how come you always wear the same clothes to school?"

"Because I have no other clothes," I replied in a bored voice. How stupid is that kid anyway.

"Why won't you get some more?"

"Because I don't want too."

"I have a question for Kadaj!" Someone else raised their hand. Other hands went up too. The teacher didn't say anything, apparently she couldn't handle the situation. She sat back dumbfounded and let the class take over. Gee, thanks teacher.

"Hey Kadaj, why is your hair silver? Are you OLD?"

"Yo, Kadaj, how come you never smile?"

"Kadaj! Will you sign my teddy bear?"

"Why are you so EMO, Kadaj?"

My face started to heat up. I couldn't take it anymore. They were asking more and more questions, and they just turned stupider. I thought of returning to my seat, but that way they would only continue bugging me. So, I merely spun around, and left. Just like that.

Nobody came to get me, so I just started walking down the hallway.

"Hall pass?" Someone asked me. I didn't even turn to them and just kept on walking. "Hey, that's a detention!" They called out after me. Like I cared.

I walked to the library. The air conditioner felt good in there. I strolled through the shelves, just killing time. I didn't really know what I was doing.

"Hey. What a surprise to actually find _you _here," A soft voice suddenly said out of nowhere. I happened to be in the romance section by accident, and there was a girl infront of when I turned around. This sort of thing is common. But not the girl.

_Her voice normally isn't so soft_, I thought. _And why the hell was she, out of all girls, in the romance section? Wait. What am _I_ doing in the romance section? _I wondered. The library was dark and my bangs were in the way of my eyes. I had thought it was someone, but really it was someone else. I'll get to who I thought it was later.

The actual person who was standing infront me indeed always had a soft voice. She had medium length silver hair, in which she braided into two braids resting on her front. She was a Senior. The only Senior girl with silver hair, and also those green eyes. Her pupils were cat like. Just like mine. Just like my brothers. No, I wasn't related to this girl. A lot of people thought she and her sister were related to me. But we were as different as night and day. However, I'll get to the specific reasons later.

She was half a head taller than me, and had a smug expression on her face. She reminded me of Yazoo _a lot_. They both always seemed content, one way or another. Even their names were alike. The girl standing before me was called Yazmin.

"I've been meaning to bump into you some time sooner or later," Yazmin continued, placing a few books in a shelf. If my memory was right, she worked at the school library. Her cat like eyeglasses, which suited her eyes to a wonderful extent (so much so it scared me), gleamed for a second under the dim lighting. I've never noticed them before. She only wears them when she reads. But, it wasn't just her elegant manner, her eerie kindness, and her strikingly accurate resemblance to Yazoo that scared me. Wait. That was all that scared me.

"I know were in a library, but you can talk you know," She chuckled lightly. She finished putting her books away and faced me with a small smile, a hand on her hip. "I've been meaning to talk to you about Keely."

That was the last thing I wanted to talk about.

"She misses you Kadaj. You two were such good friends back in our old town," Yazmin explained, coming closer.

"I-I don't care. I never want to see her again." I fled. I couldn't help it. Yazmin scared me, almost as much as Father did.

♡♡

I didn't return to class, I just left and headed home. When I remembered school wasn't supposed to be out until later, I roamed around town for awhile. I wrote small poems about the daily sights I saw, and had a coffee. When it was late enough, and I couldn't take it any longer, I went home.

Fortunately, Father wasn't there, or Loz. I was getting sick of Loz. I'm not sure if I ever liked him, but now I truly hated him. I looked around anxiously for Yazoo. I had to talk to someone, and he was the best one to talk too. I knocked on the door to his room. I've learned to do this since the last time I hadn't knocked and just came in. I hope to never remember that day.

"Come in," Purred Yazoo's voice. I raised an eyebrow. Hopefully he wasn't expecting someone else. I opened the door hesitantly, but Yazoo was just sitting on his pink leopard print beanie bag, watching television and biting into an apple. He was fully clothed. He rested his head all the way back to look upside down and see who it was that came in. "Kadaj. What's up?"

"Hey Yazoo," I closed the door. I even locked it.

"Whoa. Something the matter? I don't think Father would like to find out that we were alone locked inside my room." Yazoo laughed but I ignored his stupid remark.

"Yazoo, tell me something. Do you remember the Sisters from back then?" I asked anxiously. I took a seat on the back of a stuffed white tiger. Yazoo got up, and walked to his mini fridge.

"You mean Keely, Yazmin, and Lucy?" He took a sip of a drink and burped.

"Yes. Them...," I gripped onto the stuffed tiger's fur, sucking in my breath. Yazoo wasn't paying attention.

"Hmm...yes...," He kept muttering, going through something or other of his. Finally he stood back up. "Isn't Yazmin a Senior at our school?"

"Yes."

"I'm going to ask her out."

"What?" I jumped up. "You can't do that!"

"Why not?" Yazoo inquired, sitting down infront of his mirror and brushing his hair. "She's actually very intelligent. Did you know she works at the school library? Her grades are impressive too. Oh, who am I kidding? You have to agree that she's pretty hot," Yazoo laughed.

I growled. Did he think that this was just another game? Another woman to play? Yazmin and the others were different. Didn't Yazoo remember, remember what happened–

"Kadaj!" Father bellowed for me. I squeaked. Yazoo turned around in his seat, looking at his door.

"You better high tail it out of here. I don't wanna get involved." Yazoo yawned, and waved me away.

I stomped away, out of his stupid room, whisking away my bangs and wiping tears from my eyes. I never thought I'd actually have a reason for hating Yazoo this time.

I came to Father in the kitchen.

"Dinner time!" He cried, and dropped a prune cereal box infront of me. He cackled evilly.

"I'm not hungry!" I screamed at him. He still laughed, and went to the cupboard to grab a bowl.

"Oh yes you are!"

"Shut up! I hate you!" I cried.

He forced me onto a seat, right across from Mother. He poured the prune cereal contents and milk into the bowl he grabbed and set it before me. "Eat!" He ordered menacingly.

"No!"

He brandished his sword and rested it upon my head. I began to tremble and tears streamed down my face.

"EAT!"

"OK!"

I took a spoonful and forced it into my mouth. I also forced myself to chew. _How I hate this cereal. _

Father seemed pleased, and continued to watch me eat the stupid prune cereal. I finished and pushed away my bowl.

"_Watch your manners!_" He boomed, and sliced the bowl in half angrily. I gave out a squeak and jumped from my chair. I hate it when he brings the sword out.

"Get up and go get more!"

"But I'm full!"

"Mother doesn't think so." Father swooped to Mother and caressed her face. "She wants you to eat more."

"No she doesn't!" I choked. I leaned on the table, my hands balled into fists. My crying got harder.

"Stop being such a drama queen! I want that whole box finished by tonight!" Father ordered, and spun around to leave. I didn't complain. I took the box and ran for my room. Two raccoons slept on my mattress. I gave them the box and chose a corner in my room to cry silently until I fell asleep.

♡♡

When I came to school the next morning, I saw Yazoo's car in one of the parking spaces. It was the first time he was actually early. I quickly made my way to the library, hoping he wasn't doing what I think he was doing. _He better not ask Yazmin out. _

However, while I was walking towards the library, I saw a girl in tears. She ran past me and jumped into the nearest classroom. Something told me that was one of Yazoo's now former girlfriends. _Was he making room on his list for Yazmin?_

I slammed open the library door only to get shushed by the people who were inside. I ignored them and looked around for Yazmin. She wasn't anywhere to be found. She wasn't even in the romance section. Devastated, I ran out back in the hallway. I headed towards the Senior courtyard, where Seniors usually hung out. I sneaked past Loz who was there, tossing a football back and forth with his friends. I didn't want to draw attention to myself, especially to him.

I spotted Yazoo. He was leaning against a shadowed wall, smoking a cigarette cooly. No one can smoke and look so good. Not even any of those french people. I spied on him from behind a pillar, and watched his eyes suddenly flash. I knew that expression. Yazoo has spotted his prey. He flicked away his cigarette, flipped his hair back, and smiled his winning smile. True Yazoo routine. I saw Yazmin making her way towards him. I half expected angelic voices to rise Yazoo off the ground and have his long hair flow out behind him in a godly light. That's probably what Yazmin was seeing right now.

I watched them for awhile. They idly chatted, and walked around the grounds. Yazoo flirted like crazy. Not being able to stand it any longer, I ditched them. I couldn't watch stuff like that. I was about ready to throw up. Partly because of Yazoo's corny ways, and partly because I knew deep inside he was going to succeed in what he was doing. I sighed. Yazmin was officially on his list.

I shouldn't really be bothered by them. I wasn't. If Yazoo wanted to disobey Father, he can go right on ahead. My only problem was that I hoped he didn't get too close to Yazmin. If that should occur, then I would inevitably be involved. Keely would once again appear in my life, like how she has been trying too, for the past half year. I've been avoiding her. I've been ignoring her. I've been trying to stop thinking about her. But I should have known in the end. Keely always got her way. I wonder who decided who won or lost. I wished the person who decided that, would give me a break. Couldn't I win for once?

A week later, the game ended. I lost.

Keely found me and I couldn't run away. I sensed her walking towards me, miles away. I sensed her thinking about me and making her evil plotting. Since I sensed her so early, I could've made a run for it. But my body wasn't obeying my mind that day. I wonder who was it that turned my legs off without permission.

"You can't escape," Her voice said in my ear. I knew I couldn't. That's what makes me even more miserable.

"What do you want?" I snapped. She walked with me, holding her books. The usual mischievous half smile on her pretty face. If she didn't look so deceiving I wouldn't have my doubts. Today she wore her long silver hair in a high pony tail tied with a black ribbon, her side bangs partly hiding her right eye. She wore knee high black leather combat boots. Black ballerina stockings tied around her legs, forming two big X's each. Short black skirt. Plain black tank top. Heavy mascara on her already long eyelashes.

"I want you," She replied. She took my trembling hand. "You're so intense. You should relax a little bit."

"Don't tell me what to do," I flung her hand away and started to walk faster.

"Didn't my sister talk to you?" She asked, running and catching up to me.

"Yes."

"Good. So you know."

I actually don't remember what her sister said and I had no idea what she was talking about now. All I know is that I hate her and I'm mad her. Her and Yazmin.

"I don't know anything. _I don't know you_," I stopped and faced her. I glared her down.

She laughed. That laugh stirred inside me and rung in my head. It would gradually turn me insane.

"Oh, you know me alright. You know me too well. So much so, that what you're doing right now, is all just a big joke. Guess what Kadaj? You're funny." She stepped up to me and looked me in the eyes. Hers twinkled with excitement. "I'll see you later." She spun around, her long pony tail slapping me in the face. She strutted off and I watched her go.

I didn't want to see her later. But what Keely wants, Keely gets. I walked home, awaiting her return.

♡♡

I didn't go through the front door. I stepped in through the big hole in my wall, and saw that the raccoons were gone. The cereal box too. I wasn't getting grounded tonight. Yay?

The first thing I did was rip the Queen playing card into two more pieces. Tossing them aside, I found my old poem folder. I briskly thumbed through all the papers and documents I've saved throughout the years. I picked out four. They were badly written. I think I was in elementary school when I wrote them, I barely recognized my own hand writing. However the title was loud and clear. I ripped and crushed those poems to death. I then hid them under my mattress.

Hours later, somebody knocked on my door. It was Yazoo. "Kadaj, we've got company," He sing-songed. I scowled, carving random X's into my wall with my Swiss army knife. "Father's out. We have the house to ourselves. What do you say? C'mon," Yazoo coaxed. Unlike him, I wasn't looking for a good time. I didn't move. "Fine. I'll tell them to come by the hole in your wall."

I got up. I made my way over to the door, opening it so abruptly Yazoo jumped back. "Tell them to leave me alone. And don't even think about telling them about the hole in my wall," I hissed.

"But they're already here! You just don't turn down company like that. It's rude," Yazoo scolded, flipping his hair. He pulled my arm so that I was out of my room, and shoved me away. He closed my door and nodded over to the front door where hell was waiting. I obediently made my way over there.

I opened the door and saw that it was Yazmin and Keely. Surprise, surprise.

"Kadaj! Nice to see you again," Yazmin flashed me a beautiful smile. Instead of her usual two braids, she took all of her hair to the side and had only one big braid resting on her left shoulder. But she wasn't here to see me. She walked past me and made a bee line for Yazoo, who was already elegantly poised on our sofa, sipping wine.

I turned my eyes to Keely. She smiled at me and let herself in without a word.

Yazoo was showing Yazmin the house. I suddenly wondered where Loz was.

"Oh, and this is your dining room?" Yazmin inquired, stepping up to the doors that led to it.

"No, no, no!" Yazoo gently took her hand and pulled her away from the door. "We don't go in there. Father's rules."

_Since when?_ I wondered puzzled. I felt someone take my hand. I turned to see Keely beaming at me. "Show me your room!" She suggested. But I knew it was an order. _Like hell I will_, I thought irritably. I pulled my hand away. Her strange warm hands felt uncomfortable in my cold clammy ones.

"Sorry. We're remodeling it right now," I explained bluntly. Well, I wish. How long will I have to sleep with that hole in my wall anyway?

"Oh. I see," Keely replied nodding, her green eyes dulling out. She stood there, looking around. I wondered if she was bored. Well, it was her fault. I don't have the slightest clue on how to host women. She shouldn't of have come.

"Kadaj, fetch me a wine glass please," Yazoo called from the living room. I grunted, shuffling to the kitchen.

"I'll help," Keely offered sweetly. I just shot an annoyed glance at her. _Cut the act_, I thought. _Why the hell are you acting so nice all of a sudden? _

"Keely dear, come join us," Yazmin called. Keely looked down at her feet, then finally turned around and headed back to the living room. I gave a sigh of relief. It was like all the oxygen was finally back in the room.

I returned brandishing two glasses, one of wine for Yazmin, and not having anything else, juice for Keely. "Thanks!" She took the glass, smiling at me. I looked away and headed back as Yazmin thanked me as well. Geez, I brought two glasses of drinks. What was the big deal?

I didn't go back, but stayed in my room. When the talking and laughter stopped, and I heard Yazoo's door slam, I knew they were gone and it was over.

Finally.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey, guys! Sorry for taking such a long while on continuing the Kadaj story. If most of you don't know already, I do have other fan fictions, and sometimes real life calls for me. But after looking at all the positive reviews I've gotten so far, I felt bad and immediately set to work. I also want to apologize in advance if my drama Kadaj fan fiction turns a little cheesy with love. Romance is a plus, right? But I promise there will be lots of drama to come. I just have to go all cheesy since there are finally some female characters in play! I hope its not for long (-sighs-) Romance is so not my best field...but I'll let you judge. Happy reading!

* * *

Chapter 3

I felt so trapped. Everywhere I turned, metal bars of fear blocked me from advancing forward. I could only have such small space. At times I couldn't breathe and focusing on this obstacle only drained so much of my strength. How I wish to be free...

Keely was figuratively killing me. Now that she knows I'm alive and in her radar, she tracks me down like a hunter. Except she doesn't just kill her prey; she tortures them first. I'm no longer alone and all of a sudden I wish I was.

I can't walk to school without seeing her already waiting for me on the steps. I can't go to lunch without her already eating where I usually go. She stalks me and I can't do anything without that little warning in the back of my mind flashing, telling me that Keely is probably standing behind me or watching from afar. I've never felt so claustrophobic.

In other news, I think Father has caught on that Yazoo has girlfriends. Or, should I say, girl _friend_, seeing as how I haven't seen him hanging out with anyone except Yazmin. This was most unlike Yazoo.

Everywhere I saw him, she was right alongside him. She came over to our house more than any other girl has. The worst part was, she acted like she lived there, and she was my older sister or something. Hello? She wasn't _married_ to Yazoo. I really disliked her. She felt like one of those annoying step moms that try to substitute your real mother.

All the time I talk to Yazoo about it, he waves it off like it's no big deal. I warn him so much to be careful, but he's becoming more and more careless. He used to be so concentrated; so masterful at his craft. He dated hundreds of women (and men) in the past year without Father knowing a thing. He used to never get caught. But he's seriously starting to let his guard down...and all because ofone girl.

There's not much on Loz. Father kicked him out of the house a few days ago for failing a calculus test. He hasn't been back since. I see him at school, but I'm afraid to talk to him. Yazoo won't tell me what's wrong with him. I hate not knowing things. I hate mysterious people like Loz. And Cloud, but he's never here.

Actually, I think Loz is _with_ Cloud. I can see that now, but of course I'm not going to suggest anything and I'm done asking, because nobody will tell me or give me any answers.

♡♡

I began tearing a piece of paper into strips whilst sitting on the grass during lunch time. Keely sat beside me, chewing a sandwich and concentrating on a book. I was glad she wasn't talking. I balled the pieces of paper, crunching them in my hands, tossing them around. I couldn't stop thinking about Loz and Cloud. I was wondering if I had the guts to actually find out Cloud's address and see for myself if Loz was there.

"You seem to be having fun with the paper," Keely noted, smiling at me.

I didn't answer.

"So, you sure you don't want anything to eat?" Keely asked, rummaging around her brown paper bag.

I didn't answer.

"Hey, Kadaj. C'mon, eat this," Keely tossed something on my lap. I looked down and frowned. It was a brownie. I haven't had anything but prune cereal, and my punishment was officially over a few days ago, but I haven't eaten since.

"Yazoo told me about your prune cereal punishment thing. Seriously, how stupid is that? You must be dying to eat something else. I don't want that brownie, you can have it, really," Keely continued in that worried voice. It sickened me.

"I haven't eaten in days because of that prune cereal," I muttered, inspecting the brownie package.

"See? Go ahead and have it. I have to go to the library, I'll say hi to Yazmin for you," Keely got up, dusted off her skirt and walked away. I didn't want to say hi to Yazmin.

Speaking of the devil woman, as I was deciding whether I should eat the brownie or not (maybe it was poisoned) Yazoo came by and took a seat next to me, a smug smile on his face.

"I see you're hitting it off with Keely. You two dating?" He asked, looking at the sky.

"No. We're not even friends," I mumbled menacingly. I started to tear the brownie package.

"That's too bad. We could've doubled for dates," Yazoo lay all the way back on the grass, closing his eyes.

"Is that all you think about?" I wondered disgusted.

Yazoo chuckled. "I'm only man."

"You're only stupid."

"Hey, you having all of that brownie?" Yazoo wondered. I tore it in half, and gave one piece to him. "Hmm. This is good," Yazoo said with his mouth full.

"Hey. I'm going to look for Loz," I announced.

Yazoo sat up. "Really?" He asked. "That's a good idea. I miss him."

"He's _at_ school."

"I meant that in a different way. Loz changed. I want the old Loz back," Yazoo replied sadly. It never occurred to me that Yazoo might've loved Loz. They were brothers too. To me, it has always been Loz as my brother, and Yazoo as my other one. I didn't like Loz much, and now was even scared of him, but maybe that's because he changed. If that was the case, I wanted Loz back too. I remembered when I actually liked him. He used to let me play football with him and his friends. But now, he didn't even want to be seen with me. And his friends were real jerks.

"You know what?" I said to Yazoo, "I miss Loz too. Father should've never kicked him out."

"Father is cruel. But if you can find Loz and convince him to come back home, maybe he will come back the way he used to be," Yazoo explained.

I hoped so.

♡♡

After school, I was doing homework in the school library. Keely was there too. But you already knew that.

For the most part I was silent, as always. Keely was too, surprisingly. But soon I saw her wander off from her homework, and look up to where "Yazoo and Yazmin" noises were coming from behind the far back shelves. I had learned to tune it out.

"Yazoo and Yazmin are so cute together," Keely piped up.

"Not particularly," I replied bluntly.

"Of course they are. You jealous?" Keely wondered.

"No."

I was sometimes jealous of Yazoo, but not about that. And I didn't find making out in the library very cute either.

"I'm afraid Yazmin is going to ditch me for him. I'm jealous myself sometimes," Keely explained.

"You have your other sister," I replied, thinking about Loz. If I lost Yazoo to Yazmin I wouldn't have anyone.

"Lucy? She's always out working. And she mostly stays at her boyfriend's house anyway. She's probably moving out soon."

"Well then, tough luck," I replied and concentrated on my homework again. Usually my conversations with Keely involved her talking and I didn't respond. I didn't want to ruin the tradition so I didn't talk anymore.

After we left the library Keely invited me to watch a movie at her house. I was about to say no when Yazoo cut in, and said I'd gladly love too. Either he still wanted Keely and I to get together, or he wanted the house for himself and Yazmin, I couldn't tell. Still, I was angry at him for making me go.

I've never been to Keely's new house. Back in our old town I sadly regret to admit that I used to come over all the time, when we were friends and in elementary school. However, three years later, she moved here too but I haven't even bothered to visit her. It never crossed my mind.

When we came in there was no one home.

"Go ahead and make yourself at home. I'll go make some popcorn," Keely said and walked into the kitchen, on her way pressing a button on her answering machine. It played all the messages that people left as I looked over her living room and chose a spot on the sofa. She had a nice wide screen tv. Her sofas were comfortable and modern too.

Keely flung her shoes off and hummed as she turned off the answering machine and handed me a glass of soda.

"Nice living room," I mumbled.

"Thanks," She replied, jumping on the sofa, and settling down next to me. She picked up her remote control and began surfing through movies in the tv, and I watched the toes of her socks wiggle around impatiently as she tried to choose. She was wearing knee high, grey and light grey striped socks. She usually wore black.

"Hey, _Van Helsing_ is playing. Wanna watch that?" Keely asked looking over at me.

I shrugged.

"Ok then," Keely pressed PLAY and crawled off the sofa, checking the popcorn which called for her attention with a _ding_ from the microwave.

I watched the previews that came before the movie silently. What was I doing here? I was watching a movie with Keely. _With popcorn_. How did I end up here? I was confused. It was like my memory got erased.

Keely strutted in, holding the popcorn bowl. Smiling. Why did she smile so much? She smiled more then I scowled.

She set the popcorn between us and already began to dig in. I watched her in disbelief. Why was she acting so normal?

The movie started and out of curiosity I began to watch. I never watch movies. I had no idea what this one was about, and wasn't accustomed to knowing different types of movies. Suddenly a hand full of popcorn made its way infront of my face.

"You don't want any?" Keely asked, pouting. "There's too much popcorn here just for me."

I took one or two pieces from her hand and held them. I looked down and felt their heat in my hands. The butter greased off onto my fingers.

"Don't hold them like that. The butter will melt off onto you." I noticed Keely was watching me.

The movie was still playing. Why didn't she just watch that?

I ate the pieces of popcorn and tasted how delicious they were. Popcorn, huh? It's been quite awhile. Actually, they had a hint of prune cereal, but that's probably because I haven't eaten anything else for awhile.

I looked at Keely. She was watching the movie. She had her side bangs pinned to the side today, and I could see her eyes. I watched the movie from their reflection. I noticed she had light freckles across her small nose and pale cheeks.

"This is a good part," She muttered suddenly. I turned to the tv and watched. Some creatures were attacking these people. It was sort of entertaining but I didn't understand why the creatures were doing what they were doing. I assumed they were the villains.

"Have you seen this movie before?" I asked her.

"A couple of times. It's been awhile though, and I like it," Keely replied, taking the bowl of popcorn onto her lap since I wasn't eating any of it.

I nodded and whisked my hair away from my face so I could see better. I settled back onto the sofa and actually thought of sleeping. However I didn't want to wake up with marker all over my face. I wondered if Keely would still do such a thing, pranks like that. She loved them when we were younger.

Half way through the movie the front door opened, then slammed shut. Keely looked up to see who had come in.

"Oh, hey Lucy," She greeted. Lucy was her oldest sister. I also looked up to see her. I haven't seen her in three years.

Lucy was very attractive, just like Yazmin. She was tall and slim, had short silver hair, and a smirk was always on her face. She was always wearing elegant, short black dresses with high heels or boots. I remembered that she always had designer jewelry or purses for nailing rich boyfriends.

"Well, well, well. Is this who I think it is?" Lucy's honey sweet voice said, walking over and smiling at me. My eyes widened and I didn't reply.

"Yeah, it's Kadaj. We were just watching a movie," Keely replied for me, obviously annoyed that she had to pause it because Lucy was now in the way. Yazmin was the smart one, and very cunning. That was her weapon. However Lucy was the most deceiving woman I knew. Keely once told me she went through just as many boyfriends as Yazoo did with girlfriends combined.

I was scared of her too.

"Alright, well I'll leave you kids alone," Lucy said and walked away to her room. She had sounded disappointed and I wondered if she wanted anything from me.

"You remember Lucy, right?" Keely asked me.

"Y-Yeah."

"Ok, just checking, 'cause you didn't say anything," Keely replied, and continued the movie.

I tried to focus on the movie again. It's hard to describe why but before I was actually at peace. Now that I had caughta glimpse of Lucy, I was very nervous and restless. That's usually how I felt when I knew Father was going to lecture me on something or ground me for something again. Unlike Yazmin, Lucy has always scared me.

"I think I'm going to go," I suddenly said. I didn't even plan on saying anything, the words just came out of my mouth.

"What?" Keely asked, pausing the movie again. "Is it because of Lucy? She won't do anything. She's just in the other room, she won't bug us."

"It's not Lucy. I just have to be home at a reasonable hour," I replied, getting up.

"Kadaj, it's 5:30," Keely pointed out bluntly.

"It's almost dinner time," I said quickly and made for the door. I heard Keely sigh and get up from the sofa to follow me out.

I started down her steps but stopped when Keely called my name. "What?" I asked, turning around.

She looked at me for awhile, then looked away shaking her head. "Never mind." She closed the door and I began going down her front steps again, puzzled. I was glad yet disappointed at the same time. I was glad to be out of that house. But I wanted to watch the rest of the movie.

♡♡

When I came back home I found Yazoo kicking a roll of socks up and down while talking on the phone. He saw me come in and motioned for me to wait for him.

"Yeah, yeah. Alright, bye," He hung up and smiled at me. "So? How did it go? Details," He demanded, plopping on our couch.

"Nothing happened. We watched half of a movie. I got bored so I came home. The end," I replied and began heading towards my room.

Yazoo groaned. "Are you serious? You've gotta be kidding me."

"Yes, I'm kidding. Nice joke, huh?" I replied sarcastically.

"Your love life's a joke," Yazoo fired back, dialing on the phone.

I sighed and tossed my backpack into a corner of my room. I came backin the living room to pick up the socks Yazoo was kicking around. They were actually mine.

"I also saw her oldest sister there," I added to Yazoo.

"Lucy? How is she? She still hot?" He asked, waiting for the person on the other line to pick up.

"Yes, but why would you care? You have Yazmin."

"Loz could use a girlfriend."

"Please." I returned to my room, Loz now in my mind. I planned to find him tomorrow, since it was the last school day before the weekend. I could follow him after school, and find out where he lives. Hopefully even convince him to come back. But the only thing was...would he really listen to me?

♡♡

Loz was talking to his football buddies outside of the front entrance. I hid behind a car and waited for him to get on his motorcycle. He shared one last joint with his friends before waving good bye and walking towards his bike. All he carried was his varsity jacket in one hand, and his helmet under his arm.

Loz got on his motorcycle and strapped his helmet on. I've never seen anyone look so cool while doing that. He throttled the engine, and took off down the street. I began running down another way, but ending up on the same street he was on. He was waiting for the street light so I caught a breath while I waited in the corner. After taking off again, I followed him, running down through short cuts and alleys so he wouldn't see me.

Finally, he slowed down to a stop in some bar. _Loz drinks?_ I thought. He took off his helmet, shook out his hair, and proceeded to go in. I followed him inside after waiting a few minutes. I had snuck in quickly, and was already seated at a table before he even got to the counter. I didn't want the owner or Loz to see me.

He was laughing and talking to a woman up front. Wait. I knew that woman! It was Cloud's slut of a girlfriend, or whatever Father calls her. She nodded upstairs to Loz and he climbed up the steps. Cloud must be here too.

Since already knowing where Loz was, and chickening out on trying to convince him, I began to get up and leave. However Cloud's girlfriend noticed me and before I left she called out.

"Hey! Can I help you?" She asked. I turned around slowly, and watched the recognition come to her face. "Wait a minute, I know you. Are you Cloud and Loz's younger brother?" She asked kindly.

I nodded and walked up to the counter.

"I'm Tifa. If you're looking for Loz he's upstairs. Cloud's gone off though," Tifa explained, wiping the counter. She had a nice smile.

"Thanks," I managed and headed upstairs.

Loz was just chucking his helmet onto a bed when I came in to his room. His door was the only one opened and upon coming to the second floor I spotted him immediately.

"Loz," I called. He turned around.

"Why, if it isn't little bro. How'd you find me?" He asked, giving me a smug smile.

"I followed you, you meathead. Yazoo and I are worried. We miss you and want you home," I explained, getting to the point.

"Sorry. Father kicked me out. Besides, Cloud said I could stay here just fine," Loz replied.

"You can't stay here. Father barely comes home anyway, and even when he does, he's bound to have cooled off by now. Just, of course, don't mention you've been staying with Cloud," I said.

"I'm sick of Father. He always gets mad, he never accepts me. He's always pushing me until I'm about to explode. I'm done. I'm staying here, and doing what I want," Loz replied angrily.

"Doing what you want? You mean getting stoned everyday?" I growled.

"You don't understand," Loz mumbled.

"Maybe not, but don't think I have it any easier. We need you home Loz. You've been gone long enough. Don't end up like Cloud," I pleaded.

Loz looked at me and sighed. "I'll tell you what. I'll think about it, ok? Don't cry on me. Go on, go home," He ordered and I left, leaving it at that.

I wiped at my watery eyes and descended the stairs. When I came down I saw Cloud, briefly talking to that Tifa lady. He looked at me with is cold blue eyes.

I passed by him, on my way out, when he called to me. I froze and turned around to face him. I wasn't really accustomed to Cloud calling my name.

When I turned around Cloud just stared at me, so I decided to say something. "I just came by to see if Loz wanted to come back home. He's not sure if he's coming back though," I said.

Cloud lowered his eyes to the floor, and they darted as if he was looking for something. "You want him home?" He finally spoke up, barely audible.

I nodded.

Cloud looked at me and nodded back. He turned around and I took that as the end of our brief conversation, really the only conversation I've ever had with him.

Then I left.

I'm not the luckiest person in the world. In fact, I have more bad luck then good. I was just thinking this as I walked back home, drenched. It had started to rain. By the time I did get home, the rain was pounding so hard it hurt, and I was soaked through and through. However, when I got home, I found something I didn't expect.

Keely doesn't really follow me everywhere. Just around school sometimes. I don't know if I should have been surprised or not, but I was surprised anyway, as I saw her standing outside my house, drenched just like me. She never went as far as coming all the way to my house, but something told me she was here for a different reason.

"What are you doing?" I cried over the rain, standing in front of her. She was wearing black sneakers with jeans, and over a shirt all she had was a small black jacket. Her long hair was soaked onto her back, and her side bangs were plastered over her face. Her eye makeup had run down her face, and it looked like she had been crying tears of black.

"Kadaj!" She replied, "I was waiting!"

"Waiting for what?" I asked, puzzled.

She shook her head, which trembled like the rest of her from the cold. She had her hands in her pockets, but took one out to remove her hair from her face and wipe away her stained cheeks.

"Keely! Why didn't you go in?" I insisted.

"It's l-locked," She stammered, and I ran over to our door. It _was _locked. I pounded on it but after a few moments nobody came.

"I don't think anyone's home," I replied to her, but she shook her head.

"Yazmin has to be here. That's why I came," Keely explained.

"Tell me later. We have to get out of this rain," I replied and looked around. The rain was in sheets, and I could barely make out anything. However, I remembered just in time something very useful. "C'mon!" I called out and took her hand.

We ran and slipped over the wet grass as we hurried to the side of my house. There, I spotted the big hole in my room and I ushered Keely inside before going in myself.

Out of the rain I could hear much better, and waited for Keely to tell me why she was here. However she was looking around my horrid room.

"I'll look for some blankets," I said to break the silence.

"Ok," She replied, still trembling and dripping wet from head to toe.

I was about to open my door when I heard yells from inside the rest of the house. I placed my ear to my door, and heard more shouts. Somebody was having a fight. It could only be Yazoo and Father, but they almost never fight. Could it be...?

"You said your sister was here, right?" I asked Keely, turning to her.

Keely nodded.

Father must have found out. I wonder where Yazmin was now, and what was happening. It was most advisable not to intrude, so I backed away from my door and hoped they didn't even notice I was here, much less with a girl.

"Well? How about some blankets?" Keely asked.

"S-Sorry...I can't. My father is fighting with my brother, I can hear them. It's best if I don't intrude. Also, you can't be found out," I explained.

"How come?" Keely wondered.

"Long story. If you value your life, you better stay put here," I merely replied, heading towards my dresser, wondering if maybe there was anything in there we could use.

Keely went silent after what I said, and sat down on my mattress. I took out two shirts and two pants of mine, which I never wore and was even surprised to find. "Here, put these on," I ordered, tossing a shirt and pants to her.

"B-But these are yours, and...they're big," Keely noted feebly.

"But they're dry," I pointed out. "If you don't want it then set it aside."

Keely gave me a wry smile, and headed towards my bathroom to change. While she was there I changed myself and sighed as I flopped onto my mattress, very tired.

When my bathroom door opened, Keely came out, wearing my shirt and pants. She looked very funny and I couldn't help pursing my lips. I was about to laugh.

"Don't you say _anything_," Keely threatened, setting her wet clothes in a pile on the floor. She picked up one of her sneakers and tilted it back, water coming out in a stream.

"How long were you waiting outside in the rain for?" I asked sarcastically, watching her dump her other shoe too.

Keely laughed and shrugged. She tossed her shoes aside and sat against a wall, drenching out her hair. "What now?" She wondered.

"We wait," I replied.

Keely sighed. "I hate waiting," She complained.

"So do I," I replied, leaning against the wall beside her. I didn't want to get my mattress wet.

"I should use your phone," Keely said. "It looks like it's going to rain all night."

"You can later," I replied, still hearing an argument outside my room. I can't even imagine what would happen if I got caught too.

Keely sighed again and leaned her head on my shoulder. I didn't protest. I was too tired.

However, after a few moments, I grew bored of sitting there.

"Let's play cards," I suggested.


	4. Chapter 4

Keely was right. It rained all night long. Fortunately, the fight Yazoo and Father supposedly were in didn't last that long. It was probably about two hours before I figured the coast was clear, and I could sneak into the living room and retrieve the phone, so Keely could call someone to pick her up. I had one problem though.

Keely was snoring lightly on my lap. She even drooled a bit, but it was in a cute way. However, I needed to get up, I was getting a cramp in my leg, and after all didn't Keely want to go home? I didn't want a girl staying in my room all night.

"Keely," I whispered for the tenth time, trying to wake her up. Her head was very heavy. "Keely!" I said a bit louder, shaking her slightly. Keely just mumbled in her sleep and shifted, but didn't wake up or roll off my lap. I got annoyed.

"Fine."

I abruptly stood up, and I heard her head hit the ground hard. "Ow!" She cried and sat up, rubbing her head.

"That sure woke you up."

"Kadaj! What was that for?" Keely demanded angrily.

"For giving my leg a cramp. Now wait here, I'll go get you a phone," I replied, and left the room quietly. I sneaked into the living room and spotted the phone on our coffee table. I hid behind the sofa, peeked out to look around, and made sure the area was clear. I then ran for it; jumping over the sofa, grabbing the phone. I was charging my way back when suddenly someone said my name.

"Kadaj." I turned around. Father was standing there. Just my luck.

"Father," I replied, shifting my eyes. I hid the phone behind my leg. "What is it?"

"I'm going out, and I'm not sure when I'll be back. I leave Mother in your care. Farewell," Father said, and left. Just like that.

"What?" I said to no one in particular, because he was out of the house. What just happened here? Why was Father leaving so often? I hoped he wasn't doing any evil deeds, such is his manner. But there is a high chance he is; Yazoo, having a girl in the house. Loz, failing a school test, getting kicked out. It was too much on him. That's probably why he chose me,_ me,_ to protect Mother. He...trusted me. I was the only one left.

Guilt spread through my mind like a virus. _I'm not innocent_, I thought. _I can't be trusted. I have a girl in my room..._

But! I haven't done anything. She was there due to the circumstances, and those circumstances I couldn't control. It wasn't my fault. "Mother!" I cried, running to our dining table and facing her. "You understand! Don't you?" I pleaded.

She stared back at me with her empty eyes.

"It's not my fault! I can't control it! I can't control anything anymore!" I sobbed. I lay my head against the table, crying. "What happened to everyone? Why is Loz suddenly backstabbing the family? He's going to end up like Cloud. Cloud...who doesn't follow our ideals! Yazoo is being careless! Dear, sweet Yazoo, the cunning one, the role model. He no longer lives up to what he used to be. And I, myself, am turning into something else...but I never chose! It just happened," I explained to Mother. I felt a chill run down my back. I took that as Mother's message.

"She's...she's beautiful you see," I whispered, caressing Mother's face. Just like Father does. I wanted Mother to understand me, just like she understood Father. It wasn't fair, he was the only one...But I'll make her understand. I'll explain it all! I'll pour my feelings out. Mother knows all; she sits here, and listens to everything that happens in our house. But she doesn't know what happens everywhere else...

"She reminds me of you so much," I continued to Mother, "She's not like the other girls. Not at all. She's all I have left, her and you, both of you; my loves. Everyone else I care for no more!" I declared, for it was the truth. I pounded my fist into my palm. "I don't care if Father thinks it's wrong! He doesn't make up the rules. _You do_. And I know you'll allow it. You won't regret it, Mother, you won't," I kissed Mother's cheek, so cold against my lips.

"You don't speak, but I know you're listening. That's all I need. To know that you're listening," I said quietly. "Now I must go back to her. She's been held captive in my room long enough, and should leave this mad house...," I started to turn away when something interrupted me.

"You fool," Came Yazoo's voice.

I turned. "Yazoo?" I piped up meekly. The sight of the brilliant Yazoo; bruises and cuts on his face and elegant arms. Father's work.

"You talk like a mad man. You and Father. You're both so stupid," Yazoo continued, in this strange voice I've never heard come from him. He was angry...so angry. He's never been this angry.

"W-What are you talking about?" I stammered.

"I'm talking about Mother. That worthless piece of junk we keep in our house. That piece of tin we talk to as if it were _real_."

I dropped the phone. My mouth dropped open in stunned silence.

"Go ahead. Freak out, just like everyone else. Why are you staring at me like that, Kadaj? What have I done? _Demolished your god_? Please. You're so brain washed it's not even funny," Yazoo glared at me, something I've never experienced. He let out a sigh and passed his fingers over a cut on his face that had started bleeding again.

"What..._what happened to you_...?" I was so shocked, I'm surprised I could still make out words.

"What happened? I'll tell you what happened. I got a reality check," Yazoo spat, walking over to Mother. I quickly ran to her first, blocking her from his path. Something in my gut told me he was about to do something horrible.

"Don't! Don't come near her!" I screamed.

"Why are you protecting _that thing_?"

I trembled something terrible and began crying silently. I was so scared. I wanted Yazoo to leave and never come back.

"Move aside little brother; I have to remove her," Yazoo demanded.

"No!" I shoved Yazoo. _I shoved him_.

He was just as shocked as I was. He had fallen back and landed on the ground. I stared at him in stunned silence, not believing what I did either. Suddenly Yazoo gave out a hollow chuckle.

"I see now. I see how it is," He slowly got up and glared at me.

"I-I-I'm sorry...," I sputtered but he shook his head.

"You're not. But that's ok. Soon you will be," Yazoo replied, and walked away to his room. I didn't wait for him to come back, or anything else. I began to frantically think of a way to get Mother out of here, to safety, away from Yazoo.

But then he came out of his room with luggage and bags. My heart stopped beating.

"I'm leaving," He announced, not looking at me.

"Where are you going?" I screamed, crying.

"None of your business. But I'm going where I belong." Yazoo left then.

I cried out his name but he didn't come back. I fell to my knees and didn't get up.

But I hadn't know we had an audience. I heard my name pass through someone else's lips, and I looked up to see Keely standing over me. She was crying too.

"Kadaj," She repeated. "I'm so sorry."

"Why?" I cried out at her. "Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything..." I replied. Or so I thought. But I'll get to that later.

Keely didn't reply, but placed her arms around me. "Don't worry. It'll be alright, ok?" She said.

"No it won't," I replied, staring at Mother.

"Yes it will."

"I love Mother. So much," I said, not really knowing why. This was Keely I was talking too.

"I know," Keely replied, her tone different but sympathetic all the same.

"So much...," I repeated, and this time it was my turn to lay my head against Keely. I closed my eyes and wished none of this was happening. I wish Loz was back, apologizing about the hole in my wall, throwing his football around so much it has broken a number of vases. I wish Yazoo was back too, giving me advice on girls I didn't need, bragging about this and that, flourishing the cool clothes he wore and flipping his hair that way he did. I wish Father was here, yelling at me to turn my music off, asking what I got on a school test, and forcing me to eat prune cereal. But none of those wishes will come true. For so long I had wished I was alone...I hated my family, my school, my life. But now that I truly was alone, I wanted all those things back.

♡♡

Even though Keely consoled me throughout the next few days, she still didn't understand. You see, Keely and her sisters are different than my family. We look the same. But she's so much different...

Around three years ago we all lived in the same town. I was friends with Keely, and her sisters friends with my brothers. We had a lot in common, both in ideals and looks. People often saw us and called us "The Brady Bunch" because we were a group of six, that all had silver hair and green eyes. My brothers and I really considered Keely and her sisters, _our _sisters. I had thought Keely and I had so much in common. I had thought I could relate to her.

But then, Keely and her sisters disappeared for awhile. I was sad, and wondered where my play mate had gone. Father however had never liked our Sisters. He let us get away with it at first, but when they left, he expressed his feelings for them for the first time. I never knew he hated them so, and I wondered if there was something wrong with them that I should know about. Back then Father controlled our lives more than he did now; he said someone was bad, they were bad. He thought someone good, then we believed them good. We were naive, and believed everything he said. That way, we were nice and controlled. We behaved.

But when he heard a rumor about their disappearance, he automatically declared that rumor to be true, and he explained it. He made us believe it was true. At first I doubted it, and thought it silly._ What does Father mean?_ I had thought. _How can someone not believe in Mother...? _

It was rumored that Keely and her sisters had been taken away for brain washing. Bad people took them away, and erased their belief of Mother. Now this was before we even had Mother with us, so other people believing in her was common and no one was suspicious. But there were getting to be less and less people...soon, people laughed at us and declared us crazy, bad, sometimes even evil. Some of my friends who shared my ideals even changed when they came back from a "sudden vacation". Their hair color wasn't the same; sometimes not even their eyes. And they completely forgot who Mother even was.

"What is wrong with everyone? They're against us," I asked Father one day, when I was very little.

"They don't understand," He replied, an angry scowl on his face. Father was very stressful at those times too; people were after him.

"Why not?" I wondered.

"Because people are stupid. At least these ones are. But hopefully our world will get renewed...," Then Father went on about this crazy plan of his that I never paid attention too.

This was when Cloud began leaving us more and more. You see, Cloud was often ridiculed when in our family. He was different. He wasn't like us. His hair and eyes were different and people picked on him for it. He felt miserable, and alone, and wouldn't talk anymore. He was the oldest one so we couldn't understand him and his pains. So one day he left to explore the world, and he'd sometimes come back. Until this day that's what I think he's doing; merely exploring the world. Because he's been the same ever since, always coming and going...

Keely and her sisters came back one day and my brothers and I were overjoyed. However, their coming back didn't do any of us any good. Father banned us from ever seeing them again. We obeyed...well, the best we could. Loz was caught with Lucy one day, and Father blew his top. He "accidentally" burned our house down, Loz barely escaping. Lucy got the message and her sisters never talked to us again. Before our official departure, because we were moving away obviously, Keely told me that they weren't talking to us because they were afraid of Father; and not because they didn't like us. When we moved out of our old town to this one, I was happy knowing that. But not for long. Father forced more things in our head, and soon we grew to hate the Sisters. That explains why, when Keely and her sisters just so happened to move here too after a few years, I didn't answer when she called. I didn't talk to her when she asked me too. I avoided her, ignored her, hated her.

But now everything has changed.

Keely had made her way into my life once again, but I'm still not sure if that's a good thing or bad. Father would obviously think it was bad; you know what happened between him and Yazoo when Yazoo was found out. But when I'm around Keely, it feels right. It turns into a good thing.

But Father didn't have control of our lives anymore. Slowly, one by one, everyone left, now I'm all alone.

That was all I thought about, day and night. How my life suddenly turned more miserable than it ever was. My only comfort was Keely and Mother. And Father still hasn't come back from wherever he went. Yazoo I've only seen at school. But even there, I haven't seen him much. Sometimes, not at all.

♡♡

"Come over tonight. I have a surprise for you," Keely said to me one day at school.

I frowned, and ran a hand through my hair. "I'm not sure if I can," I replied quietly. I have been going straight home everyday, staying by Mother's side day and night. I was so afraid for her. Father has yet to come home, and I wished he'd hurry up.

"Please?" Keely pleaded, looking up at me. She was so close...I could have kissed her right then and there. But I didn't. It was something that happened only in my thoughts, and shouldn't happen in real life.

"Alright. I'll try," I promised, just to get her to stop asking. I was more miserable than I've ever been lately, and felt as if nothing could fully satisfy me; not even Keely's surprise. Whatever it was.

"You better. I know you'll like it. But you need to pinky swear you'll come," Keely stuck her pinky up, and awaited for me to conjoin my pinky with hers, swearing that I'd come. I don't know who invented this mode of swearing an oath; gripping someone else's pinky with yours doesn't make a different whatsoever.

I sighed. I wasn't sure I was coming so I couldn't swear I could. "What kind of surprise is this anyway?" I wondered as we walked down the hallway.

"I can't tell you, it's a surprise," Keely laughed. "But I know it's something you've been wanting for a long time now."

That got my mind whirling, trying to figure out what it was. However I couldn't think of anything that wasn't perverted.

"I won't come if I don't know what it is," I finally said.

"Kadaj!" Keely replied sternly. "That's not fair."

"Life isn't fair," I pointed out miserably, and she gave me a worried look.

"I can't stand seeing you like this. Trust me, you'll like this surprise! It's for your own good!" Keely insisted. "Please come!"

"Ok, ok, sheesh woman."

"That's more like it." She held up her pinky again. "Pinky swear!"

I reluctantly raised my pinky too and conjoined it with hers. She smiled and instead of letting go, she swung our hands together. "I'll see you later. Don't forget!"

I watched her let go then walk to class.

♡♡

I walked to Keely's house around dinner time. It was tempting to come earlier, but she specifically said when it started to get dark out, or around dinner time, whichever. Was I having dinner at her house? Was that the surprise? That wasn't something I've been wanting for a long time. Food didn't interest me.

When I was at her door she opened before I even had the chance to knock. "Come on in!" She called, pulling me inside by the arm and quickly kissing my cheek. I placed a hand on the spot and looked around, but not really seeing anything. I was suddenly bewildered.

"Hey, don't worry, it's going to ok. You'll see!" Keely said, but to me it sounded far away. She lead me into her dining room, which was next to the kitchen. I saw Yazmin cooking something in there. Next to her...was Yazoo.

My hand fell from my cheek, and swung at my side. I stared at Yazoo's back, and watched as he and Yazmin talked and cooked together.

"Surprise," Keely whispered in my ear. I turned to her. She was smiling really big. I guess she thought she had done something good for me. Was it good? Is this what I really _did _want for a long time? To see Yazoo again, being days since we last saw each other, after he parted so heartlessly? Yes. I guess it was.

I almost started crying with relief to see that Yazoo was safe and sound, even though he hurt me badly. And even though he was with Yazmin (again) I still felt happy to see him. I looked at Keely again who was still smiling at me.

"I...," I hesitated. Telling her I loved her would seem too sudden, wouldn't it? "...I mean, thanks," I said instead, and she nodded, smiling even wider. Then she nudged me to say something, so I turned my attention back to Yazoo.

"Yazoo," I called finally. He turned around slowly, then stared at me in surprise. Was he not expecting this some time or later? I mean obviously, one day, I'd figure out he was with Yazmin. It was too obvious.

"...Kadaj!" Yazoo suddenly ran to me and hugged me tightly. "What are you doing here?" He asked.

It was as if what happened between us those nights ago never happened. When I walked in here to find Yazoo, I half expected him to chase me away and tell me never to come back. Or I even expected him to tell me he hated me. I was expecting all those things.

"Keely brought me here. She brought me back to you," I replied.

"Well, good. I'm glad to see you little brother," Yazoo let go of me and ruffled my hair.

"Why are you so happy? I thought you hated me now. The way you left...," I trailed off.

Yazoo kept smiling. "I'm sorry about that. I was too harsh. I scared you, didn't I?" He replied.

I nodded.

"Yes, I'm sorry for that. But I had to leave that house. You don't understand yet...," Yazoo turned to Yazmin then and she smiled at him. "However, here, I can devote all my love to anyone I want. That includes you," Yazoo turned to me again.

"You're right. I don't understand. You could've have loved me at home too, like you always have. You have no idea how miserable I was...still am...since you left. Father left that same night, just before you did. Loz is long since gone. I'm all alone," I replied.

Yazoo's smile dropped and he placed a hand on my shoulder. "I didn't know. I thought Father would have at least stayed, so you would have him. I'm so sorry."

"It's alright. I'm glad you're happy and well. You like it here?"

"Yes. It's better then our house. I'm free here. I'm even doing better at school. Kadaj, I have a job!" Yazoo threw his head back and laughed.

I couldn't help smiling, even if for a bit. My mouth wasn't really used to smiling, but if it was, I would have been smiling through and through now. Yazoo, working? It definitely was something to laugh about.

"Dinner's ready," Yazmin suddenly announced.

"Come on, little brother. Now you'll finally see what it's like to really have a family dinner," Yazoo told me, and steered me into the dining room. I didn't like how he said that; we had perfectly fine family dinners at our house.

While we were eating, Yazmin suddenly asked me, "So you're really staying at your house all alone?"

She looked worried. I looked away from her and nodded.

"Yazoo, you should do something," Yazmin said to Yazoo, taking his hand.

"There aren't many options. Either Kadaj moves in here too, or I move back," Yazoo replied.

"Well, actually, there's only one option. Either you move back Yazoo or I'm alone because I'm not moving in here," I said sternly. I know Keely was hearing this and I hoped she didn't get the wrong message. If it were up to me, I'd move in here in an instant just so we could all be together, just like old times. Like sisters and brothers. Well, with a few benefits.

"How come Kadaj?" Yazmin asked.

"Because. I can't disobey my father..."

"Oh, come off it Kadaj!" Yazoo suddenly cried out. "You're not going to end up following that lunatic all your life, are you?"

"Father may have different ideals then everyone else but he is by no means crazy," I fired back at Yazoo. "He's Father. Why are you betraying him?"

"Because it was for the best. Best for me anyway. I don't know why I wasn't the _first_ to go; Loz I guess is definitely smarter than me." Yazoo leaned back in his chair, all sure of himself.

"Well I'm sorry. I'm all he has left. He may come out cruel, obnoxious, and intimidating, but Father has feelings too," I said quietly.

"I can't believe I'm hearing this from the same person whom a few weeks ago hated the man. It's as if you've forgotten all the punishments he's bestowed on you," Yazoo replied, draining his wine glass.

"Please, just stop," Keely suddenly piped up. We all turned to her. "If Kadaj wants to stay at his own house, let him. I mean it's his house. I don't blame him," Keely added, looking at me. She gave me a small smile.

I was about to smile back (it takes me awhile to finally do it, I'm not used to it) when Yazoo sighs and I turn back to him instead.

"Fine. Let's not quarrel. I think we did enough of that the day I left," Yazoo said, giving me the good ole' Yazoo smile he used to always give me. Then, I looked around, and everyone was smiling. How come it was so easy for them? Well, the first thing I'm going to do when I go home is smile. I'm going to practice smiling.

"Well, Keely and I will clear the plates. You two can go watch tv or something," Yazmin spoke up, and got up. Keely got up too. I looked at Yazoo and he nodded to me, so I stood up with him and follow him out of the dining room.

We took a seat on their couch. Yazoo sighed happily, sinking back on his chair and closing his eyes for a moment. I stared at him. Finally, he opened his eyes and looked at me.

"So. How's school?" He asked me.

"Alright."

"That's good."

"How come I never see you?" I asked.

Yazoo sighed. "I'm there. It's just that I don't really play around anymore. I'm taking school seriously now."

"Wow. All this change...it's all Yazmin's work, isn't it?" I wondered, out loud by accident. I meant for it to be a thought.

Yazoo didn't answer for awhile. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, she kind of took over your life."

"That's usually what happens when you fall in love."

"You're really in love with her?"

"Of course. I wouldn't be here, _cooking_, if I wasn't in love with her. _Capiche_?" Yazoo replied.

"But I thought even though you were bisexual, you were more on the homo side..."

Yazoo didn't answer for awhile on that one either. Then, so abruptly it scared me, he threw his head back again and laughed really hard.

"What? It's true. You had more boyfriends than girlfriends. You talked about your boyfriends more admiringly. Now all of a sudden, you fall in love with one of the girls you're dating?" I wondered.

"Sure, I was playing around for a bit. But I grew bored of playing in general. When I reunited with Yazmin after all these years, I realized I've loved her all along. Even when we were back in our old town. Even though Father banned me from ever seeing her again..._twice_, now," Yazoo replied, laughing. "And she's not _one_ of the girls I'm dating. She's the only one now."

I didn't ask any more questions on that. What could I say? Yazoo was in love. And he wasn't just saying that either. If he really did cancel _all_ of his relationships for one person, then yes, he was definitely in love. I've heard scary stories about people who fell in love. They did all sorts of crazy things. I hoped Yazoo didn't end up doing anything drastic. I haven't experienced Yazoo in love. Wait...or have I? Were the things he said, back the night he left, were those really his words? Or just what Yazmin said?

"Yazoo...," I called.

"Yes?"

"How come you don't believe in Mother anymore?" I asked. I patiently waited his answer. Sometimes people in love didn't even have a reason for doing something. They just did it.

After a silence, longer than the others that happened in this conversation, Yazoo averted his eyes away from me. "I guess I thought she was the reason," He finally answered.

"The reason for what?"

"The reason for Loz going away, but not coming back. Loz himself probably thought Mother was punishing him so he never came back. The reason Father is so harsh with us. Father is so obsessed with Mother he doesn't truly care about our feelings. And finally...because if I don't believe in Mother, then I can love Yazmin," Yazoo explained quietly.

"What does loving Yazmin have to do with Mother?" I wondered, even though I knew the answer.

"Don't act stupid. Father himself said Mother wished us not to love any other woman other than her. I couldn't do that. I was sick of sneaking around, going overboard just so I wouldn't get caught by Father. And for what? Because he believed Mother 'said so'? I just couldn't believe it. Don't you think if Mother truly understood us, she would let us do what we desired, and have who we desired?"

I didn't answer.

"Besides, I actually still believe in Mother. I just had to say all those things because I needed to take Mother away," Yazoo finished.

I turned to him, shocked. "Away? Away where?" I cried, for I remember when Yazoo told me to move away from Mother, because he was going to "remove her".

"Yazmin says there's a better place for her. That she was better off here."

"Here? But why? Keely and her sisters don't believe in Mother, remember?" I asked shrilly. Why the sudden interest in Mother? Was this why Yazoo didn't let Yazmin see the dining room, the first day the Sisters came to our house? Because back then he believed they shouldn't see her, or where she was, in fear that they'd take her away?

"They don't. And I do remember; Yazmin and her two sisters _did_ get brainwashed. But they need Mother for something. I understood, so I decided to help them out," Yazoo replied.

"Are you crazy?" I cried. "You can't go around moving Mother around! She'll fall apart! And remember what Father said? Anyone who wants Mother is just lying, because they really just want her for themselves!"

"Our Sisters don't want Mother for themselves. They don't believe in her, you said it yourself. So I saw that it was perfectly safe to help out," Yazoo replied, a confused look on his face as if all of a sudden it didn't matter who placed their dirty paws on Mother.

"You didn't _see_ anything. You just saw another way to help your little girlfriend out," I hissed, getting up.

"Kadaj, stop. You sound just like Father..." Yazoo suddenly looked scared. I was very angry, and didn't want to look at him anymore. Actually, I did sound like Father, and all this anger towards Yazoo I was feeling, was probably what Father felt when we disobeyed him.

In any case, I didn't care _who_ I was acting like, I just knew I had to get home as soon as I could and figure out a way to move Mother to another place. Somewhere Yazoo and the others don't know, so she'll be hidden and safe.

I made my way to the front door. I heard Keely come back from the kitchen, notice me leaving, and calling out my name. I stopped out of instinct, but for only a second. I threw open their door and continued on going outside.

"Kadaj, wait!"

I stopped but didn't turn around.

"Kadaj..." Keely came up behind me and threw her arms around me.

"Please, Keely. I have to go," I said bluntly.

"Don't go. What did Yazoo say to anger you like this?" Keely wondered, turning me around so I faced her.

"Nothing."

"It couldn't of have been nothing," Keely insisted sternly. She was frowning, but looked as beautiful as ever. I reached up to her and tilted her chin upward, so I could see her face better.

"I'm sorry I stormed out. But it isn't something I can discuss with you," I explained calmly.

She looked up at me and asked, "Why are you tilting my face up towards you?"

"I-I don't know...," I replied, taken aback by her sudden change of subject.

"Are you going to kiss me?"

"I-I don't know...," I replied, turning red. How can she be so forward about something like that?

"Then why don't you do it already?" She asked me.

"Um..."

But I didn't, and couldn't, say anything else. Keely stood on tip toe, flung her arms around my neck, and pressed her lips against mine. She was kissing me. I was kissing her? We were kissing. My eyes were still open in shock and embarrassment even after she backed away and smiled at me gently.

"It was about time I did that. You don't know how long I've waited for the right moment," Keely said.

"Is there really a right moment?" I wondered.

"No. Not really. I guess I just felt like getting it over with," Keely replied. I didn't know what to do next. I mean, here was Keely; smiling, beautiful Keely, standing there looking at me. Was she waiting for something? Another kiss? A confession? A bravo?

"I...like y—cereal," I said. What? I like _cereal_? That's not what I wanted to say! I slapped my forehead.

"What? You like cereal?" Keely asked, confused.

"Yes."

"Oh..."

"Never mind about that. I like _you_, Keely."

"Oh. I like you too Kadaj."

"Alright. That's good. Or else that kiss would've been for nothing," I replied.

"Maybe it _was _for nothing. I just like getting your hopes up," Keely joked. Well, I hoped she was joking.

"I like you getting my hopes up," I replied and Keely laughed. I smiled. I actually smiled. And I really do like cereal. But I like Keely even more.

♡♡

When I opened my front door, still abit dumfounded you can say about the recent events, something even more unexpected surprised me that night.

Father was home.

"Father?" I called, walking towards him. He had been sitting on our sofa.

He looked behind him, and seeing me, he got up. Then he made his way over to me and looked down upon me with his stern look that always seemed plastered on his face.

"Welcome back Father. I took good care of Mother," I told him proudly.

"I see that. I half expected to find her in pieces," He replied gruffly.

"Oh, Father. After all the work we did to piece her together?" I chuckled. I chuckled at Father. Even while I was doing it, I couldn't believe I was. Why was it that I was in such high spirits when just twenty minutes ago I was searing with rage at Yazoo? I felt Keely's lips against mine again. They weren't cold like Mother's cheek. They were a lot different.

Father did something unexpected again. He smiled at me. Suddenly my own smile from chuckling dropped, and my eyes watered. "I missed you," I mumbled to Father.

"I understand why. You've been living here all alone haven't you? That idiot Yazoo moved out."

"Yes. But both him and Loz are doing well where they are now. They've told me so at school," I lied. I missed Father, and was glad for his return, but I couldn't afford to tell him the whole truth.

"That's alright Kadaj. I'm home and we can protect Mother together," Father replied, and placed an arm around me. I looked up at him bewildered, and for the first time since I've ever remembered, I hugged him. And he placed a hand on my head.

I didn't understand why we needed to protect Mother. I mean, we've always had to protect her, but not specifically against anything. Father knew something I didn't, perhaps, but I didn't care. I was more than happy to do anything for Mother.

I was promised a surprise that night. Instead, I got many. All of which, I was glad to experience. I do hope I get surprised again.


	5. Chapter 5

When I was walking home from school I passed by a video store. I thought it was one anyway; there were movie posters, and advertisements of movies around it. I walked in and asked one of the people who worked there (they wore blue shirts) if this was indeed a video store. The man merely looked at me oddly and replied that it was. I thanked him and began looking around, just like I was in a library.

This video store fascinated me. It was indeed like looking through a library; all these movies, they were like reading books except you didn't read, you watched. I saw all kinds of movies; romance, horror, comedy. I didn't know what to choose, what to do. I decided to call Keely since I was so confused, and I haven't done this before.

"Hello?" Came Keely's voice on the other line.

"Keely!" I replied excitedly. Usually when I called her and heard her voice, I'd forget what I called her for in the first place.

On the other line she laughed. "Yes, it's Keely. What's up Kadaj?" She asked.

"I'm at the video store."

"Really now?"

"Yes," I replied excitedly, "There are so many movies here. I simply can't choose. Which type of movie would you like to watch?"

"Um, I don't know. Are you saying that we're going to watch a movie together?"

"Yes; we should. Like that last time. Do you still have popcorn?" I wondered suspiciously.

Keely laughed. "Yes, Kadaj, we still have popcorn." I could picture her smiling even though I couldn't see her.

"Alright. Well what movie do you want to watch?" I asked again.

"What are you in the mood for?" Keely asked back.

"I'm not sure. I kind of want to watch all of them," I replied uneasily. I paced through the aisles, feverishly looking at all the videos propped up on the shelves. Even though I didn't know what any of them were about, I was curious and wanted to watch.

"Well, usually horrors are fun, especially in the dark," Keely suggested. Oh yes, of course. Keely really did like horror related things. Those are usually the types of books she read too.

"Alright, well there are thousands of horror movies here," I replied, walking to the horror section. I chewed my bottom lip in thought as I gazed at all the titles. They were all so interesting!

"Why don't you pick one out at random?" Keely suggested.

"You don't seem too excited about this," I pointed out, noticing it in her voice.

"I _am_ excited. Why wouldn't I be? I get to spend time with you," Keely replied, sounding more cheerful. "I just don't really care what movie you get."

"Alright...that sounds good. I'll just pick one out at random then," I replied and closing my eyes, I reached out for a random video. I picked one out, looked it over and thought it interesting.

"Ok, what do I do now?" I asked Keely.

She laughed. "You go to the counter and rent it. Come to my house when it gets dark, ok? That way it'll be much scarier," Keely replied. "Plus I got homework so I can't watch now," She added, and I could picture her rolling her eyes.

"These movies aren't..._too_ scary, right?" I wondered nervously, getting in line.

"Don't worry about it; If they are, I'll be there to protect you," Keely reassured me with a chuckle.

"I sure feel protected," I added jokingly.

"Ah, shut up," Keely replied laughing. "See you later. Bye."

I hung up too and rented the video. I was so happy I ran home, and had to stop at our porch to catch my breath.

At that moment my mail man stopped by my neighbor's house (we never get mail) to place mail in their mailbox. "Hey Mail Man!" I called and waved at him.

He looked over at me and waved back, uncertainly.

"I rented a movie!" I shouted, loud enough for the whole world to hear.

"That's great Son," He replied, shaking his head and getting into his truck.

I grinned. "And guess what?" I cried, even though he was already driving away, "I'm going to watch it with Keely tonight!"

I turned back to my house and went inside, running to Mother. "Mother!" I cried, placing the video next to her on the table. "Guess what?"

She stared ahead with her empty eyes and I'm sure she turned towards me in a questioning motion, even if it was probably less than an inch.

"I rented a movie!" I cried out in delight. "And I'm going to watch it with Keely! Tonight!"

♡♡

I stood next to my window for hours, watching the sky. When it finally turned dark, I happily went back to Mother and retrieved the video from the table.

"I'm going to Keely now, Mother. If Father asks, I went bowling," I said to her, making my way out of the house.

When I came to Keely's house and knocked on her door, nobody answered. I rang the door bell a couple of times and looked through her window. Finally, I tried opening the door and found it unlocked. I strolled in hesitantly, wondering if I should have come in or not.

I stood there a few minutes when suddenly Keely came out of a room, wearing a towel around herself and her hair wet.

"Keely!" I exclaimed, sprinting over to her. She turned red and her eyes widened a bit but all the same I went up to her and kissed her.

"Kadaj...you came so soon," She said, looking surprised.

"Of course. You said when it got dark out, didn't you?"

"Well, yeah, but...," Keely looked around, then down at herself, "I'm in a towel."

"So?" I replied happily, and kissed her again.

She laughed and shook her head. "Just go sit down, and I'll be right back." Then she left quickly to her room.

I made sure I still had the movie and walked over to where her tv was. I examined her video system, trying to figure out how to work it. I placed my hand through this opening, only to pull it back quickly, for it almost got stuck.

Minutes later Keely came back and came up behind me, placing her hands over my eyes. "What 'cha working on?" She asked.

"I was trying to figure out how to work this, but seeing as how I can't see...," I replied, my vision still blocked by her hands. I heard her laugh and felt her kiss me before unveiling my eyes.

"Let me do it." Keely took the video and placed it in the system, then picked up a remote.

We walked back to her sofa and plopped down; Keely snuggled up against me and I set my eyes to the tv where the movie was starting to play. Unlike last time, I was going to watch the movie and try to understand it. There was already a bowl of popcorn on the table and I reached for some, giving half of it to Keely.

But there was something in my mind that was bugging me. "Keely?" I called to her.

"Yeah?"

"Are you my girlfriend?" I asked.

She chewed her popcorn and replied, "Uh huh."

"So that means we're dating, right?"

"Yup."

"Would this be considered a date?" I wondered.

"I guess. Why all the questions all of a sudden?" She asked.

"Just wondering," I replied, tossing more popcorn into my mouth. Was this what Yazoo did with his girlfriends? Or did they go on actual real dates, like how I sometimes read in books, where they went to restaurants and stuff? Would Keely rather do that than sit here watching a movie?

While I was watching, somebody suddenly got killed. The killer chopped and chopped at the poor victim's body; blood was going everywhere. I swallowed and focused my attention on the opposite wall for awhile, until that scene ended.

Keely took my hand. "You alright?" She giggled.

"Yeah, I'm just not used to watching stuff like this," I replied.

I was happy to be watching a horror movie with Keely but how could she stand watching it without flinching? I'd look over at her and she seemed excited, sometimes she'd even laugh. That made me laugh back, because she has got to be the weirdest person I know.

"What's so funny?" Keely wondered.

"You. You're laughing while somebody is getting killed," I pointed out, trying not to laugh myself again.

"Well, it's not because the person is getting killed specifically, it's because of how cheesy they acted out the death," Keely explained laughing more.

"Like you're an expert," I noted rolling my eyes.

"In fact, I am," Keely replied grinning up at me. Her cat like pupils widened and twinkled. Behind her green eyes I saw my own, and for a moment it felt again like we were the same person. I remember feeling that when we used to play with each other as children.

While I kissed her I thought to myself; Why did Father hate them so? Why were we banned so much from interacting with them? Apparently, the more I thought about it, the more Father seemed so wrong about it all. If we all once believed in the same thing, we all could've been family, right? But Father hated them from the beginning. But the real and only question was why? And this question has been in my mind for a long time now. For too long. Did Yazoo ever want to find out why? Did Loz? What was the big secret that for some reason, it seemed as if everyone knew except for me?

I think I've said this once before. There is too much mystery in my world. In every world, there are secrets; that's perfectly natural. The truth isn't available for everyone. But even knowing that, I have an uneasy feeling because I don't like not knowing things. Then I become curious, and that's even worse. If you don't know everything about someone then one day they can surprise you. Like Loz, whom for still unknown reasons, left. Yazoo left, and I only know part of the reason. Am I the only one who hasn't deserted Mother because I don't have a reason? Is it because I have no secrets? How I hate being obvious. Having mystery is so much more appealing, and it gives you a sense of security I guess. I would love to feel more secure. Even though certain things in my life are now making me happy, there are still bad things. Actually, a lot more. It's like if I enable myself in receiving desirable things I had to pay consequences and receive more misery. Am I suddenly hating my life all over again? There are...far too many questions...

"Kadaj..."

Keely's voice sounded heavy and I realized I had been kissing her for a while now; in turn I was out of breath and I had managed to pin her down on the couch.

"Oh...Sorry...I blanked out," I mumbled. A stupid excuse. Keely laughed and wiped her forehead, sitting back up.

"You sure do like kissing don't you?" She asked jokingly.

"Yes; very much so," I replied, untangling my hand from her hair. I was still embarrassed by what I did so I didn't look at her. Next time I'm kissing Keely I shouldn't reflect on the questions that rule my mind. But there were so many, and it was as if there were even more when I was around her. Was she a link, perhaps, in everything?

"We missed some of the movie," I pointed out. "Can you go back to it?"

"Um, nah, it's fine. We'll just watch it from here," Keely replied, finishing the popcorn.

"But...I don't understand the story now," I insisted.

Keely looked at me funny. "Kadaj, it's ok. It's not like this is the last time you'll ever watch this movie, or any other. It's just one movie," She said.

"Not too me. I don't watch movies. This is my second time; both of which I didn't watch all of it," I replied.

Keely paused it and looked at me. "This is your second time watching a movie?" She repeated.

"Yes, that's what I said."

"You're kidding, right?"

I stared at her. Why would I lie to her? She looked back at me and seemed perplexed.

"Tell me Kadaj, why is it that you can't watch movies?" Keely asked, in this strange voice that reminded me of my school counselor.

"Because Father says they're no good. And that it'll fill our minds with bad things," I replied hesitantly. I knew it sounded stupid, but it was the truth, and that was all I was willing to give to Keely. If she had to know about Father's harsh and embarrassing ways, so be it.

"Uh huh. And, what exactly else are you 'banned' from doing?" Keely asked, and for a moment I thought I recognized anger in her voice.

"Many things...I can't remember all of it...," I replied nervously.

"Do you often follow what he says?"

"Yes, I'm mostly the only one."

"So how are you allowed to see me?" Keely demanded. I suddenly realized what she was thinking about. The night Yazmin and Yazoo were found out; Keely probably knew all about that from her sister.

"I'm...not," I finally replied and my eyes swelled up with tears. But I did my best not to cry infront of Keely.

"So you don't follow Mother or whatever."

"I do! I do with all my heart!" I replied sharply. "She allows me to see you."

Keely looked confused now. "If she allows this then how come your Father thinks differently?"

"Because, Mother understands me now," I looked down and ignored the burning in my eyes. "Father doesn't know yet though, but she'll tell him one day."

"Kadaj that doesn't make sense." Keely looked at me worriedly.

I didn't reply to her statement. Of course it didn't make sense to her, she didn't even believe in Mother.

♡♡

Throughout the next few days Keely showed me lots of things I couldn't experience because Father never allowed me too. I felt bad, opening my world wider than that of which he allowed, but Keely persuaded me and I was sure it was alright with Mother.

We went to an amusement park once. That was lots of fun. Then the next day Lucy drove us all the way to the beach, and I marveled at the waves. We did lots of other stuff I guess people did everyday, like go to malls and even more movies, except these were displayed in very big screens. I never even knew I had time to do all those things, and it was a whole new world I hadn't known.

But with these new things, Keely often nagged me about Mother. I usually ignored her ideas and doubts, because it was a common thing to come from someone who didn't believe. But Keely was so passionate about it; she claimed all those things from the bottom of her heart. She said she was trying to help me, and that she cared. I knew she cared, but I didn't need help. I often didn't like people who offered me help. What kind of 'help' did they mean, and why couldn't they understand I didn't need any? I tried explaining to Keely that I was fine. She usually looked at me worriedly and dropped the subject.

The more I did fun stuff with Keely the more I had to lie to Father. I knew his trust in me was slowly fading, but if I told him the truth, it'd completely go away. If I had one wish, any wish I wanted, it would be for him to understand. But I knew he couldn't, and I abided by those circumstances.

On one of the rare occasions in which Keely was with me in my house, she suddenly asked me if she could see Mother.

"Why would you want to see her?" I asked her back, puzzled. Keely didn't believe in Mother. Keely thought Mother shouldn't rule my life. I didn't hate Keely for thinking that, I just respected her different ideals. However much Keely herself hated it, I was going to follow at least some of Father's rules, and I believe his biggest one was not allowing people to see Mother.

"I'm curious, that's all," She replied, shrugging. "Why can't I see her? Is she too holy or something?" Keely asked, swiping her side bangs.

_I shouldn't do it, but then again, what could it hurt?_ I thought. It was then that I had given up on my conscience completely. Lately, Keely was my conscience.

"You can only take a peek. Actually, I _want_ her to meet you...perhaps then she can understand why I love you so much," I explained to Keely and she smiled in reply.

I lead Keely to our dining room. There sat Mother at the table, and I displayed a smug smile. It didn't matter what I was feeling; Mother comforted me every time, automatically.

Keely walked forwards towards her slowly, staring directly at her. "Wow...," I thought I heard her mutter under her breath. It seems the image of Mother can be overwhelming to people who weren't accustomed.

"Mother this is Keely. The one I talk about so much," I said to Mother.

"Does she reply? Is she a robot?" Keely wondered, looking at Mother's back, front, and all around. I laughed. Was she looking for a button or something?

"Of course she replies. You just have to listen carefully," I explained, but it was going to be hard for Keely, since she didn't believe.

Keely sat across from Mother and stared at her, fascinated it seemed. I watched the two of them interact. It filled my heart with joy and I never thought I could feel so happy. I had thought I have already felt the maximum of happiness, but this was the climax.

"Keely, we should go. I never know when Father will come," I finally said.

"A-Alright," Keely replied, getting up slowly. She finally turned her head away from Mother and followed me out of the dining room.

"Mother probably thinks you're really beautiful," I told Keely as we walked towards my room to leave through the hole in my way. It was the most safe and secretive way.

"Hmm. Maybe," Keely replied, and it sounded as if she was lost in thought. Even when I kissed her good bye she seemed distracted, so after she officially left I went back to Mother.

I talked to her about Keely for awhile, then Father came home. He didn't ask me anything, but just went straight to his room. I shuddered at the thought, that if he had come any earlier, or if Keely had stayed any later, I would of have been caught.

♡♡

Keely now was obsessed with Mother. She still didn't really believe; she just wanted to know the how's and why's. How come we followed her orders? How come we could hear her? How come we worshiped her so? Why did we? Why did we listen? Why did we have her in our home? How? Why? She asked me constantly.

It was difficult to reply, and I supplied few decent answers. How can I explain something so natural to me? The things she asked...they were just there. I didn't know how. I didn't know why. And I didn't really care either. Keely however was so curious about the whole thing.

When I came over to Keely's house, Yazmin asked Yazoo and I stuff too. Yazoo replied easily, and automatically. I didn't know how he could do that. To me, it was hard to describe feelings of Mother. Like I said, they were just there. However telling the Sisters this information wasn't hard at all. I trusted them now, and sometimes I actually tried to understand Yazoo and his reason for moving in with them. I think I was getting close to knowing.

It was when Father didn't come back for a whole week that Keely got worried about me. I moved in with them temporarily, and Yazoo took care of me. I remember when I doubted him and questioned him for doing what he did. But I saw and felt that moving in with the Sisters felt nice and it was a good change. When they asked us questions about Mother they understood. That was the difference about our houses. Here, they had understanding.

One day I was picking up some stuff from my house and Keely came along. I let her look at Mother while I got my things in order. I looked about my room and wondered how on earth I had ever slept here. The hole in my wall brought tears to my eyes, but I'm not sure if they were happy or sad.

When I came back to get Keely, she was fumbling with Mother's chords.

"Keely! What are you doing?" I demanded, and she jumped, for she hadn't known I came in.

"Kadaj, I had a good idea. Why leave Mother all alone here? Let's bring her with us," Keely suggested.

My mouth dropped open but I thought about it. I've slept over at Keely's house for only a little while, but I've missed Mother so much throughout that time. I was used to knowing she was close to me and that I could talk to her whenever I wanted. Perhaps it was the best thing to do?

"Well...I guess we could try and move her. But be super careful; if one piece falls apart I'm literally dead," I warned Keely.

I put my stuff down and helped her find a way to move Mother. I felt excited and nervous, because I remember when I couldn't even think about moving Mother. But things were so much different now.

I looked under Mother to examine her chords carefully. However, when I came back up, I got the shock of my life. I literally felt my skin turn paler than usual, and my heart jump to my throat.

Keely was standing there, shaking and I could see tears filling her eyes every second. As thin and sharp as a needle itself; Right up against her throat with a familiar glint; was Father's sword. Father was standing there, holding the sword up with concentrated determination.

I was very scared and even though I wasn't the one with a sword to my throat, I trembled and started to cry just as hard as Keely.

"Kadaj," Father spoke softly, "What are you doing?"

"I-I-I'm sorry, p-p-please put the sword down!" I cried, in a desperate attempt to save Keely's life. I wasn't even sure mine was so safe at the moment.

Father didn't move. He had a twinkle in his eye, and I watched him stare at Keely, who was crying silently.

"Father, please!" I fell to my knees and looked up at him. He only looked at me for a moment. In that moment, however, he probably saw the desperation in my eyes.

In a flash that I barely caught, Father had removed his sword from Keely's neck quickly and she fell forward on the ground; the flash was a mix of white from his sword and red from Keely's blood.

Upon seeing Keely grasping her neck and gasping, blood trickling through her fingers, for a moment I thought she was dying. However, I couldn't move, and was afraid to do anything. If I helped Keely, would Father assume I wasn't loyal to him or Mother anymore? Then would he kill _me_? But if I didn't do anything soon Keely would die.

Suddenly Keely's head hit the floor softly; she lay motionless. A small pool of blood was forming on the carpet.

I didn't care if Father yelled at me, sliced me in half, whatever. I ran over to her and sobbed over her body.

"Stop crying. She's not dead," Father suddenly spoke up.

"You might as well have killed her," I replied in a hoarse voice. "Why? Why did you scare h-h-er–me like t-t-that?" I stammered, pressing my hand over her bleeding throat and holding her in my arms.

"I was going to kill her. Maybe that would have taught you a lesson," Father growled. "How many times have I told you, over and over again. Never show Mother to anybody. Now look what almost happened. We almost lost her."

Father walked to Mother and started examining her. I didn't listen to what he said and I didn't care about him anymore. The only thing in my mind was Keely, and what I was going to do with her.

"I n-need to call the ambulance," I said a loud, and looked around in an attempt to find the house phone through my blurry eyes.

"Don't you dare call anyone. Just take that wretch away from here." Father was still occupied with Mother.

I wiped my eyes, but the tears still came. Keely was very pale from loss of blood and she was soaked with it. My hands were covered in blood as well from pressing down on her wound, so I decided to lay her somewhere and look for some bandages. I picked her up and carried her, walking out of the room and away from Father and Mother silently. I'd deal with them later.

I lay Keely on my mattress carefully, then searched in vain for bandages of some kind. I found the crappy ones for small cuts. That wouldn't do for the deep gash across Keely's throat, which now started bleeding all over again. It was also hard to concentrate when my whole heart was crying in vain for her sake. I shouldn't of have showed Keely Mother. I never should have let her persuade me to move Mother either. I should...I should have...

I ran to my drawers and found a shirt. I tore it half, then into strips. I ran to my bathroom sink and soaked it in cold water. Then I ran to Keely and cleaned her hands, face, and arms. By the time I was done the strips of cloth were covered in blood, so I cleaned the strips too. I wrapped them around Keely's neck, using it as a bandage. Her blood soaked through them but it didn't spill. I wondered if I was doing the right thing. I wondered if Keely was going to die, and I wondered how I'd cope with that. I should've called the ambulance a long time ago. Maybe even the police. Father killed Keely. He should be taken away. But then, how would I deal with losing both Keely and Father? If I killed myself things wouldn't get any better. They'd probably take Mother away; Yazoo and Loz surely wouldn't take care of her properly.

I wasn't tired and probably wouldn't sleep, but I lay myself at Keely's side. I brushed her hair away from her face, and stroked her cheek. She wasn't dead; her whole face was burning. Then why wouldn't she wake up? I wanted her to talk, to move, anything. In my anxious waiting for her to awaken, I fell asleep without knowing it.

It felt like only a few minutes later, I felt shifting at my side. I woke up and automatically looked over at Keely. She stirred; her head turned the other way, away from me.

"Keely," I whispered in a groggy voice. My throat and eyes were very dry from crying, and they were both irritating me. My stomach hurt terribly from nerves.

Keely's head faced upward and she slowly opened her eyes a little.

"Keely," I repeated louder, and bent over her.

"Kadaj," She replied in a hoarse whisper. She coughed and grabbed at her throat. She was probably feeling like hell.

"Keely, you're alright," I said aloud, more to myself. With a grateful sigh, I rested my head with hers and closed my eyes.

"Kadaj...I...need to talk," Keely said with difficulty.

"No, you have to rest. We'll talk when you get better," I told her. She fell asleep again, and a few hours later she woke up.

I was still sleeping, I probably have never slept so much in my entire life. She woke me up by trying to sit up. I opened my eyes and watched her struggle; I placed my hand on her shoulder and pushed her back down gently.

"You can't get up. Haven't you noticed you're terribly hurt?" I told her.

"Kadaj...I'm fine now," Keely replied, still in a hoarse voice but much better. She rubbed her eyes and I examined her carefully.

"You sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure...," She replied.

"Good. That's, that's very good," I said and lightly kissed her pale lips. She looked at me for awhile, and tears came to her eyes.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Kadaj I need to tell you something."

"I'm sure it can wait, you still don't sound too good," I replied. "I should change your bandages too."

I stood up and prepared new bandages for her. In the meantime she managed to sit up by herself and lean against the wall. I saw her finger her wound lightly and wince.

I came back to her and started damping her face. It was almost as if she had a fever, her face was pretty heated up. I cleaned her neck for her and started to wrap the new strips of cloth around her neck again. I was very close to her and noticed her eyes were red from crying, and probably not being able to sleep properly. She had run down make up on her face that had dried on her cheeks, which added to the sadness on her face. I didn't like seeing her so sad.

"Keely, you can't stay here forever. You should go home soon," I told her.

"I need to talk to you first," She insisted taking my hand.

"I don't want you to talk. I want you to rest, go home, and get better. I can't stand seeing you like this."

Keely suddenly started to sob then and I didn't understand why. I wanted her to stop.

"Stop crying, it doesn't do any of us any good," I said softly, stroking her hair.

"P-P-Please, stop helping me," Keely replied, and stopped me from finishing up her bandages.

"Keely, I need to bandage you. You might start bleeding again...," I pointed out and stared at her.

"I don't care! I don't deserve this from you Kadaj!" She cried out shrilly. My expression turned into worry. I was afraid the shock and trauma from what she went through was making her delirious.

"Don't talk like that..."

"I don't deserve you Kadaj! You're such a caring person, you...you should find s-somebody

else-," Keely continued, not listening to me. I barely understood her between sobs and ignored her delirious exclamations. In an attempt to console her from hysterics I hugged her to me but she continued protesting.

"Don't, don't do this...I-I'm not who you think I am," Keely sobbed.

"I know exactly who you are," I replied, holding her head against my chest. "You're the one I love and trust the most."

But unfortunately that only caused Keely to cry even harder.


	6. Chapter 6

When I came home from the hospital that day, I saw Father standing there in the living room. He had been waiting for me. Father had been gone for awhile, but I hardly noticed. I was either at school, Keely's house, or the hospital, where Keely had gone for awhile.

"Take a seat," Father ordered me.

I continued to scowl as usual and did what I was told. I thought the least I could do was listen to Father after what I did. But I wasn't in the mood for any type of his lectures.

"Can you tell me what you were trying to do that night...," Father started. "I come home and I find you with that girl. That's already bad enough. But I hear talk of removing Mother...I see actions of removing Mother..."

"I was only doing the best for Mother," I muttered, staring at the table top.

"The best for Mother?" Father repeated in a sneer. "Since when do _you_ know what's best for her?"

"I know! She talks to me too!"

"Hardly. You act as if you know so much when truly you know nothing. You understand, nothing. I'm all that you should understand. Anything else, anything that girl taught you or your foolish brothers, are all wrong. And you know it. But you decided to rebel anyway. And to think, I thought you were the only one left...," Father said, circling the table and making sure I heard every little bit of his lecture. I couldn't tune him out. I wanted to plug my ears...but I couldn't do that either.

"You act like you can talk to Mother. Kadaj, how many times have I told you, I'm the only one she can hear. I didn't make that rule up. It's just how it is. Your pathetic mind is only playing tricks on you.

"In fact, your mind itself has grown so weak, so useless, that you cease to stand for your own beliefs. You let others walk all over you. You were never as strong as your brothers, at least they had the decency of following something and sticking to it, no matter how wrong it was. But you. You're fickle; you don't know what's right or wrong anymore. You have no sense of direction. You're walking around in circles like an idiot. But somehow you think that's alright. Tell me Kadaj, do you think you're superior than everyone else?"

I didn't answer. In these times your best bet with Father was to be silent and let him do all the talking.

"You do, don't you," Father replied to himself and gave out a horrible laugh. "You honestly think you're better than me? How predictable. Well let me tell you something. There is _no one_ better than me. Not even your brothers are worthy of what I'm capable of. You've known this all your stupid, pathetic life. But you prefer to deny the truth and go ahead and form your own rebellious little ideas. Actually, they're not even your own, they are those of that–,"

I shut my eyes tight and tried to tune out all the horrible things Father went on to call Keely and her sisters. It wasn't fair to them. They haven't done anything wrong. If anyone were to be punished of the wrongdoing against Mother, I supposed it was to be me.

"Stop," I muttered. Father didn't stop. "Stop!" I cried and slammed the table with my fist.

"What? You have something intelligent to say for once?" Father mused.

"No! I don't! It doesn't have to be anything, I can say what I want. Stop talking like I deserted Mother! I haven't! You're just assuming all these horrible things that you don't even know for yourself! Have you ever talked to Keely, ever, in your life? No, you haven't, and you haven't talked to her sisters either. You don't know anything about them. All you do is assume! You act like you know everything too when you don't! And it's not only the Sisters either it's your own family!" I cried at him. "You don't know one honest thing about me, Yazoo, or Loz. Nothing. _Nothing_."

Father stared me down. "I know that you're all pathetic weaklings who are slowly turning just like everyone else. Mother told me all along I should have done this by myself...," Father said mostly to himself.

"I'm not weak! I'm not-," I started but Father struck me across the face and I flew back against our sofa. I looked up at him. "Hit me all you want! It doesn't change anything!"

"And to think I used to think you were the strongest of all of your brothers. I saw them fading away before they realized it themselves. At least you stuck by longer. But it wasn't too long before you started succumbing to their ideals as well."

"What are you talking about?" I screamed at him. "I haven't changed!"

Father smirked to himself. "You have. And you don't even realize it. How amusing as well. How can it be that all of you have deserted me so soon..."

"I haven't! Just tell me what I have to do to prove it to you!" I got up and walked up to him. "Ask anyone," I hissed, "I'm the only one whose left. You haven't even been home to notice."

"Mother tells me everything that's been going on. She says you've been a particularly bad boy."

"I've done things I wouldn't usually do for the sake of others but I haven't changed inside. When I wanted to move Mother it wasn't because Keely told me too. I considered that it might've brought Loz and Yazoo back together. Without Mother they have lost their way, so I wanted to bring her back to them," I replied.

"A foolish idea. My upmost rule was to never remove Mother or show her to anyone. You've disobeyed. There is no way that I can regain your trust," Father explained bluntly.

"There must be. You possibly can't be thinking of leaving all by yourself. I can tell you're disappointed that everyone's left you..."

Father snorted. "Please. I only need Mother and nobody else. I've always been a one man team."

"Please," I begged, "I've lost Yazoo and Loz just like you have! They don't want to come back home and they don't listen to me. I want to be with Mother too. If she leaves with you I want to be with you too."

"It's no use. You've fallen victim to the outside world I tried so hard to protect all three of you from. I'll let you fend for yourself when you realize that the people you trust now aren't whom they seem," Father explained and started to walk away. I wanted to follow him and see where he hid Mother. You see, he has moved her, but nobody else but him knows where she lies.

"How can I know when nobody tells me anything?" I cried tugging out my hair. I was really frustrated at all the questions that have for so long been unanswered, and Father could have answered them all along.

"I don't want to tell you. You've accustomed to ignoring everything I say. Perhaps it would be better if someone you trust told you. For now anyway, I'll be here, in _my _house. I don't care what you do with your life anymore. Go ahead and rebel all you want," Father replied, and continued to walk away to his room. I heard him lock his door.

I went back to my own room and resumed some of the usual activities I used to do before my life turned for the better, if only for a while. Now it was as miserable as ever. Now, I had to make decisions that I didn't want to make. Could it really be that I had to choose between Keely and Mother now? If anything, that was the worst decision I've ever been forced to make and the worst thing that's ever happened to me. Considering that many awful things happen to me in a daily basis anyway.

♡♡

I went straight to Keely's house after school to visit her. Every day I did I bought her flowers, and so I carried a new bouquet with me now. She was no longer in the hospital so I was happy to know she was getting better.

When I walked in to her house nobody was home. I went ahead and headed to her room, knocking first. Nobody answered. I figured I should at least leave the flowers in her room so she could see them.

However, when I opened the door Keely was there. She was sleeping in her bed and looked peaceful, however her brows were furrowed together in an anxious way. I hoped she wasn't having a bad dream. I gently placed the flowers next to her and was making my way back when something awful called 'Guilt' and 'Curiosity' took over me. Father's words played back in my mind...and at that moment I knew I had to find out. What was it that Father knew about the Sisters that I didn't?

I looked over my shoulder back at Keely, breathing lightly while she slept. It wasn't fair to intrude her privacy. But if I wanted Father to trust me again...

I slowly made my way over to her desk. Now that I think about it I haven't spent much time in Keely's room. I shuffled through school papers and assignments, daily normal stuff. However under these I found different kind of papers. They were more official looking, and seemed important. I didn't read them because I couldn't understand what they talked about.

The more I looked, the more I found more professional things. It was then that I found some more papers, but I recognized some words...

My heart skipped a beat as I vaguely remembered some of these words. They made my stomach feel sick and heavy. Father said these words were bad. I read words like _Shin-Ra_, _SOLDIER_, and other things of the sort.

"Wha...what is this?" I muttered to myself shrilly and couldn't help but look some more. I found more documents, reports, and even I.D. cards. What did all this mean?

"Kadaj?" A soft voice came from the bed. I turned around to see Keely sit up and rub her eyes. Suddenly she realized what I was doing and a look of desperation crossed her face. "Kadaj, what are you doing?"

"Oh, this?" I mused, flinging her papers on the floor. "Just finding out some stuff. Apparently, that _you _never told me..."

"I was going to tell you, you never gave me a-,"

"I think if you had really cared you would have told me earlier," I snarled. "What's with those papers Keely? What do they mean?" I demanded.

Keely started to cry and didn't answer. She looked down and noticed the flowers I had gotten her.

"I'm so sorry..."

I don't know what went over me. Normally I would have started to cry and run away. That's usually what I did...but suddenly I felt my own eyes flash and this weird sensation come over me. When I looked at Keely she looked depressed and scared. But mostly scared...

"Why?" I demanded. "Why do you work for those people?"

"You don't understand Kadaj, there's a reason why I did what I did," Keely started to explain through her tears.

"So you do work for them!" I cried.

"I, no, I-,"

"You don't work for them?" I asked. She didn't answer. She looked at me sadly. "Oho! So you _do_, and you've been hiding it from me all along...," I clenched my fists and didn't look at her.

"You still don't know why Kadaj, please don't get mad...," Keely whimpered.

"Mad? _Mad_?" I repeated and took the flowers I got for her. I ripped them in half and threw them on the ground and Keely looked at me in sheer terror.

"Don't you dare look at me like that! You betrayed me Keely...you...," But I couldn't continue. The whole thing made me so mad. And it wasn't Keely that mostly caused my anger...it was merely the fact that _Father was right all along_. I should have listened to him...now I was stuck in this mess, with these people who want to take Mother away.

"Let me explain!" Keely cried getting out of her bed and coming towards me. She stood in front of me but didn't come any closer. She began to explain with her face looking down, and I watched her tears stain the carpeted floor.

"M-My sisters and I do work for Shin-Ra but it's for a good thing-,"

"Nothing those people do are good..."

"Yes, Kadaj, yes! When we got cured we didn't want to be experiments anymore! We agreed to one last experiment in exchange for Mother!" Keely cried. She shook her head. "I...I just wanna be normal again..." She began to cry in her hands. "And now, all because of that you had to find out the hard way, and-and you think I did it because I wanted too..."

"But you did do it because you wanted too. You used me. For...for Mother and your stupid experiment!" I cried but suddenly felt dizzy. I grabbed my head and gasped.

Keely looked up and her hands started to tremble. "Kadaj...what's wrong?"

I barely heard her voice, my ears were ringing. I fell to my knees and grabbed at the floor with my hands, trying to understand the frightening images that somehow made their way into my mind. _Experiment_, _Shin-Ra_...why were these words causing me to see such horrible flashbacks that were not my own?

"Please Kadaj...forgive me, please," Keely knelt beside me and stroked the hair away from my face. I grunted, ignoring these wretched sensations, and pushed Keely away from me.

"Father was right. I should have trusted him all along. Look what I almost did...," I said to myself, looking up at the ceiling. "I almost lost Mother. _Almost_. I was saved at the last minute..."

"Saved? Kadaj, you're not saving anyone, not even yourself," Keely choked. She wiped at her eyes frustratingly, and I saw her eyes blaze over. She stood up from where I pushed her. "I thought that maybe if I told you what I was up too, you'd agree and join. _You'd realize_. Maybe, you'd open your eyes to what's real-"

"The only thing I realize is your deceiving heart! Your betrayal and your lies! How you treated me like I was your own puppet to manipulate!" I shouted at her.

"You're right Kadaj!" Keely screamed back at me. "You're nothing but a puppet to your father's stupid ideals. He's using you just like I did. He has been, this whole time. You're Sephiroth's best work."

I gasped. "Don't you call him that!" I cried.

"He's my target, I call him what I want," Keely sneered. "Why do you think people are after him? Why do you think nobody else but you and him believe in this 'Mother'? It's not you against the world Kadaj. The world's against you," Keely picked up the ripped up flowers and threw them in my face. "Unlike you, the veil across my eyes got untied. The world isn't just black and white. It's in color and full of wonderful things. I was sick, and tired, of being used and discriminated. Just this one experiment...this one try...can turn my sisters and I back. The mental procedure has been all taken care of, if you can remember, three years ago. Now it's all up to the physical transformation, baby," Keely explained, smiling at me insanely. Suddenly she scowled and pulled at her long hair. "You see this disgusting silver hair? It's going. These horrid green eyes will be seen by no one anymore!" She cried and finally pushed me out of her room.

"Keely," I said, finally mustering up the nerve to say something. Keely scared me now, more than I scared her while I went totally out of it. Now she in turn was going crazy. "Before you officially turn back, consider it. Please. It doesn't only have to be me and Father. You used to believe in Mother once too, didn't you?" I asked her, staring one last time at those eyes, for some reason now, that she hated. All this fighting hurt me and I wanted _my _Keely back. Maybe if she joined Father and I we could still be together. I placed my hands on her shoulders and felt her tremble under my touch. "Why go through all this when you can just stay as what you were meant to be?"

Keely wriggled out of my grasp and stood her ground. "This isn't you talking Kadaj! This is Sephiroth! Can't you see?" She cried and slapped me. I let her go ahead and get away with it, and I didn't say anything.

Keely sniffed and started to cry again. She grasped her probably now sore throat from yelling, and placed a soft hand to my inflamed cheek. "All this yelling is doing nothing good for the both of us...we're both going crazy," Keely muttered.

"That we are," I replied, "But what is so bad about being crazy?" I wondered. It seems crazy people were thought to be bad, even if the most craziest person in the world...could also be the most harmless.

Keely didn't answer my question and looked up. "I'm sorry once again for lying to you," She whispered.

Suddenly I remembered why I was here and fighting with Keely. I got mad again. "Is that it then? Is your explanation over?" I demanded. I pulled her hand away from my face.

Keely stared at me longingly and for a moment I thought I recognized the old Keely, but my heart has long since learned that she is now gone. "Then I'll go," I said, and turned away from her. "Enjoy the flowers."

♡♡

As I was leaving, and while I was leaving, that's all I could think about. Leaving. I wanted to just _leave_. Leave Keely, leave Father, even Mother. I wanted to leave everything and start a new, or even better, go back in time. Have you ever felt that way?

I didn't really comprehend half the things that went on or what was said back at that room. Really, all I remember was that it was an intense, long fight. My heart had been racing, my ears ringing, and my mind whirling. It was hard to have paid attention that way. All I _did _know was a few things.

Keely was bad. Father was right. Keely pretended to be somebody she was not. She lied to me and backstabbed me. Worst of all she used me. Yazoo and Loz are not coming back. They've been brain washed, just like I almost have.

All these things were facts, and from now on I'm sticking with facts, since I'm not sure about anything anymore. I used to be alone. Now I'm alone _and_ confused. Actually, I think I've been confused my whole life.

Still, I can't help crying helplessly when I'm alone with my thoughts. You see, Father has been long since ignoring me, so I've kept to myself. My mind sometimes replays that awful day with Keely without my permission. In a way, she was just like Father. They both wanted to control my life and tell me what to do. When I remember Keely yelling at me, Father's words ripple through me and echo. "You're pathetic. What a weakling..."

It seems there's always going to be someone better than me. Controlling me, like the puppet Keely said I was. There's always going to be two sides. I wonder. When can I get my own side?

♡♡

As I've said before, I didn't really understand what recently happened and only abided by some facts I knew were true. However, the things I did know, were enough to create the most misery I have ever experienced.

For awhile (I never really keep track of days, so I go by how long something feels) I stayed cooped up in my room. I never left. For those of you who think outside the box, no, I didn't eat and even though I was in my room I hardly slept either. I've always been that way, but I was ten times worse then before when this whole mess started.

At first I was so angry. My walls have always been pretty weak (hence the hole that still resides in my room) so when I grabbed my Swiss army knife and tore at them, some pretty big rips emerged. Still, it quenched at least a little bit of my anger. I don't have much in my room other then the mattress and drawers I probably have mentioned sometime earlier, and my mattress was already pretty ripped up and stabbed through already. Sometimes I was so angry I stood outside when it rained so it'd cool me off.

Then, my anger turned into sadness. I would cry the whole day, everyday. I didn't even know I could produce so much water from my eyes, but I did anyway. When I had been angry, I couldn't think clearly and went by impulse. However, what got me sad, was that now I could think and remember things clear enough that I realized once again my situation. My heart wrenched in pain and soon my eyes got sore. When I was in my sad stage, there was a lot of pain.

Then one day I just turned numb. I didn't think or flash back on anything anymore. The hunger and pain melted away. I had spent enough time in my room, and even though I wasn't hungry anymore, I ate just because I knew I needed food.

I looked for Father all day one day, but he wasn't anywhere. I waited around, then one day he actually showed up. He was surprised to see me.

"I thought you had run away somewhere," He said.

"No," I replied, scowling. "I was just in my room for a long time."

Father sneered. "Well, what a progressive way to spend your life. What about school?"

"I thought you didn't care anymore. So nor do I," I replied and walked out of the door. I didn't even know why I confronted him. I guess I wanted to see him after a long time, even if it didn't mean anything to him. As I left I heard him sigh and realized he probably did care that I was skipping out on school. I considered going back. But there were some things I were to avoid if I went back to school...

Anyway I tried not to think of those "certain" obstacles, and decided to clean up my appearance to fit the decency of being able to go to school. Father may have left me, but nothing said he wanted too. Maybe if I showed him I was done feeling sorry for myself, and would keep going to school, he'd trust me and talk to me again.

♡♡

So I went back to school. At first everyone ignored me out of fear and perhaps their own safety, but soon things changed for worse. I liked that everyone avoided me, and that they left me alone. However, curiosity got the better of them and soon questions popped up on why I looked the way I did (I haven't checked, and frankly never do, but I assumed I looked worse than usual) and how come I had disappeared for so long. Besides, asking all these things only got me angrier. It seemed as if they cared when really they didn't, and just wanted to hear what they wanted to hear. I didn't yield to their wishes and didn't say anything.

I didn't stay too long at school at first. I actually ran away much earlier then I was supposed to on the first day. But however, I was numb and didn't care about anything so I figured I could stay. Going to school didn't prove to be much of an accomplishment, or a big bonus of improvement, because I was worse then back before everything happened. Before I only paid little attention but now I sometimes even slept in class due to lack of sleep in my own house. I have no idea what we're doing in class, I go just to be there. I thought the reason I wanted to go back to school was because I wanted to please Father but now I'm not so sure what I'm doing there.

Due to lack of energy both in the food and sleep department I wasn't very agile. I was very late to all of my classes. To put it in blunt terms, I was failing miserably in school just as I was miserable at home. There was no where I could go where I could feel whole again.

One day I was getting up slowly to leave the class when it ended (and when the bell woke me up from my sleep) I felt this pain in my stomach. I was used to it but this one was different. I was felt unstable, and dizzy and after a few moments I woke up in the nurse's office. It seemed I had fainted in class, with everybody watching and I immediately go mad. How could I embarrass myself like that? The fuss that everyone probably caused to get me here...

I looked around the nurse's office. It sickened me and I almost threw up the non-existent contents in my stomach. It was very...white. Too white. The room blinded me and I didn't even notice the nurse come in.

"How you doing there Kadaj?" She asked me in a nice voice.

I didn't reply.

"You know, the reason you probably fainted was because your eating habits aren't too healthy at the moment. Is there a specific reason you've been doing bad in class? Your teacher tells me you never pay attention, even sleep half the time. You're always late too and you don't participate in anything. Is it a problem at school? Home?" Nurse lady asked.

I didn't reply.

She didn't say anything for awhile and checked my temperature and all that useless crap.

"So, when was the last time you ate?" She asked.

"I don't know," I muttered. A month ago? Who knows...I didn't care.

"Well I have some candy in my drawer. That should settle your stomach for now; After that I want you to get a good lunch at the cafeteria. We must do something about your eating habits Mister!"

"I don't like candy," I told her but I don't think she heard me.

She came over and placed some in my hand. I looked at the candy and finally at her, and noticed she had been staring at me.

"Kadaj you sleep in class a lot don't you? But why are your eyes so red?" She wondered.

I didn't reply and inspected the candy. How did she expect me to eat this?

"I'll tell you what. I'll ring up your counselor for you. Won't that be fun?" Nurse lady smiled at me and went to the phone.

What the hell? How is that supposed to be _fun_? This lady was the one who needed a therapist. Not me. I was perfectly fine. Why couldn't everyone just leave me alone?

I was sent to the counselor's office awhile later. I won't go over the details, because frankly I don't know them myself. I'm accustomed to staring up at his books and therapist awards when he talks and I don't pay attention. All I can tell you is that first he went over my health habits, and he blabbed just like the nurse that I should eat more healthily and sleep more. He explained my lack of energy was very unhealthy. What do I care if its unhealthy? What if I _want_ to be unhealthy? I don't want to be like everyone else.

After that he went on to explain the reason I was being like this was probably because I was depressed. He asked me again and again what I was depressed about. However, I couldn't really tell him. Unless he wanted to sit there and watch me lecture a novel's length on why my life sucks.

"Maybe something at school? Bullying? Student threats?" Counselor guy wondered.

I haven't been getting bullied anymore. But the occasional threats still do come, but they are pretty mild. For some reason there's this new word kids are calling me now. I don't know what it means and I've tried looking it up, but I couldn't get a serious, official description. Who the heck came up with the word "Emo" anyway?

"How about at home? Is everything ok with your family, your parents?"

No. Everything is not ok with my family. I don't even have a family anymore. And don't get me started on my "parent".

The counselor saw that I wasn't responding, but he kept asking me questions anyway.

"How about friends? People who were close to you? Did any one of them betray you in some way that now, you feel like you have no friends? Maybe you're depressed about that?"

Hmm. What can I say? This is man is obviously a master of his craft. Yet, I didn't confess anything. I had the right to remain silent.

"Alright Kadaj, I'll let you think about it. It seem you're not really in the mood to talk so I'll let you go to lunch. The nurse does advise you to eat something. If anything is bothering you, don't hesitate to come to me," The counselor dismissed.

Right. I'll come running when somehow, Father talks to me again. Yazoo and Loz move back in. Keely will magically un break my heart and erase all the hurt. Right.

I got out of that horrid room and headed home. Screw lunch. Screw the nurse and that counselor.

However, my "accident" wasn't a mild incident. People started to ask me if I was ok. I ignored them when a familiar voice asked me the same question.

"Hey, Kadaj. Are you alright? I heard what happened." It was Yazoo.

I turned around and faced him. He gave me a worried look. "What's up with you man? You look like shit," He noted. Thanks Yazoo. I believe I feel like shit too.

"What do you want?" I demanded.

"I want to know how you're doing. I haven't seen you in a long time," Yazoo replied calmly.

"Because you never tried seeing me. I haven't seen you either, perhaps it's because you've been avoiding me. So don't come out with that stupid worried look, suddenly acting like you care. I don't need your pity," I told him coldly.

"Wow. I can't believe you think that. I haven't been avoiding you, Kadaj. I've just been busy. Now that I heard something happened, I wanted to find out if you were ok. I mean, you always liked being alone, I thought you were content. But it seems you're not doing alright like I thought. You're as pale and skinny as ever. Have you seriously not been eating?"

"No. I haven't. And I'm not hungry," I replied.

"C'mon Kadaj. Eat something with me. You have to stop acting like this, you'll get hurt," Yazoo warned.

"I believe I can't be hurt anymore then I am now, thank you," I replied and started to walk away. Yazoo held me back.

"Look, don't walk away from me. I'm going to take you to my house and we're going to talk things through, alright? You have to turn your life around. You're going nowhere like this."

"Stop lecturing me. And more importantly, don't try to help me either," I replied. What was he talking about, _his_ house?

"Kadaj...what are you going to do? Why can't you just _let_ someone help you?" Yazoo asked.

"Because when they try to help, they only make everything worse. I mean, you think you're being helped? Yazoo, you're brain washed. Don't you know that?" I tried to explain, but I wondered if he'd know since he was brain washed and all.

"Yes. I do know."

I stared at him. "You _know_?"

"Are we talking about the whole Shin-Ra thing now? Oh, Kadaj. Are you still following Father?"

"No...he...deserted me," I mumbled.

"About time. Haven't you realized he doesn't want anyone? He wants to be alone. So why the hell are you still following his rules and ideals as if he trusts you again?"

"I don't follow Father. I follow Mother," I snapped. Though, I'm not sure whether I do anymore either.

"You don't even know where she is," Yazoo snarled.

I wonder how he knew all this. "Are you a spy too?" I asked.

"No. But I am helping with the experiment. And I think that's the thing that will change you. It will make your life better, Kadaj. Take it from me," Yazoo explained. "I'm still trying to help you. Why are you going to such an extent to please someone who doesn't even care whether you exist or not?"

"I don't want to be brain washed. I don't want to follow anyone. I only want to be left alone," I told Yazoo.

He looked me for a moment, and finally shook his head. "Well, you got your wish. Are you happy now? Everyone's left you. Are you sure you don't want to join Loz and I?"

"Loz?" I wondered. "Since when was he on to the whole experiment?"

"He was the whole time. Though, it wasn't the Sisters who introduced him to it. Cloud hooked him up. Loz is doing much better. He's stopped smoking and laid off the drugs. He helps Cloud around with his business," Yazoo explained. "You see? Brothers stick with each other."

I leveled my eyes with his. "I have no brothers," I replied coldly. I turned around and walked away.


	7. Chapter 7

I was in my room writing some tedious poetry. I had burned all my other poems, whether they were about love, hate, or whatever else I wrote about. I didn't care whether they were good or not; I just wanted them gone.

My poems were getting to be more like diary entries really. But they weren't as long, and sometimes didn't always explain what happened "throughout the day" like most dumb diaries do. I have some really good poems that are just two lines. Sometimes those are my best.

Usually my poems were just what I felt. But lately I've been feeling the same everyday. Just. Plain. Shitty.

I did many things to get my mind off of stuff I didn't want to think about. I actually did homework; it was at least something to do, and for some reason it pleased my teacher. Go figure.

I did work around the house, though I have no idea why. I half expected Father to show up and appreciate all that I've done. A boy can dream, right?

He never showed. At times I got the feeling he never cared, either. But I hate admitting that Yazoo is right. And by the looks of it, he was getting to be right about a lot of things. But I was only thinking this way because Father wasn't here to reassure me that what Yazoo and Loz are doing is wrong.

Right and wrong. Does it even matter anymore? This endless war is seriously starting to drain all thought and feeling from me. What's left of those things anyway.

I hardly spent time at home. I roamed the world I had for so long been blinded too. Sometimes I had an adventure just walking down the street. I walked everywhere. There was so much to see, even if it was the same thing I saw yesterday, and the day before that. In a new day, it all just seems so different.

I wonder if Father ever took the time to appreciate tedious stuff like natural beauty. Like watching fountains. Or watching rain. Or just plain watching people and the stuff they do. Sometimes I write short stories about the people I see. But in my stories, I'm in there with them. Right in on the action. I'm not just an admirer from afar, watching closely, wanting to join but knowing I can't.

I have long since concluded that I'm not normal. I'm not like the people I see everyday. And its not just my hair color; or my eyes either. It's everything else too.

I wonder why I'm so different. And why me? I felt just like they did. I wanted everything they wanted, plus some other things, since I wasn't like them.

There's a blind man that lives next to me. One day I saw him yelling at his cat while I was walking by his house. I stopped to watch him. The cat ran away; yet he continued yelling. The use of unnecessary anger pained me, so I calmly spoke up and informed him the cat was long since gone.

He stopped and stared at me, even though he couldn't see me.

"What's your name, boy?" He asked.

"Kadaj," I replied. "I'm your neighbor."

"Come inside," He told me gently. "I have something for you."

At first I was scared. I was raised never to talk to strangers (thank you once again Father for impressing the useless need of extreme safety on me) but this was something that didn't happen everyday. It was a new story to add to my daily adventures. Father wasn't here to protect me from the world. And I didn't want to be protected, either.

I zipped up my coat and walked up his porch steps, following after him into his small house.

"Emilia baked cookies, but I can't eat them. I'm never hungry and my stomach just don't hold them the right way, if you know what I mean," The old man said, and shoved a platter at me.

"Thank you," I replied softly, inspecting the cookies. I was rather hungry since there's never any food at my house, so I picked one off the platter and nibbled on it rather slowly. "Whose Emilia?" I wondered.

"She lives two houses down. She's always baking this and that; thinking that I don't eat since I live alone! Well, I tell ya, I may be blind but I make the best hot dogs in the world!" The old man proudly proclaimed.

I chuckled. This man was off his rocker. But...weren't we all?

"You better be off. You seemed like you were going somewhere important; off you go!" The old man suddenly shoved me with unexpected force from his door way.

I didn't bother to ask how he knew I looked busy if he was blind. Blind men were strange and magical that way. "Thanks again for the cookies," I told him, and off I went like he told me too.

On my way to the park, I handed all the cookies to a homeless man. "Bless you, Son!" He called out in a croak.

"Sure," I muttered, not wanting to be thanked. That old man was right. Those cookies tasted horrible.

♡♡

I bet you're wondering about Keely. You're wondering why I haven't talked about her or even thought about her this whole time.

But I have. I think about her a lot. I just don't talk about her because there's just no one to talk too.

At first I was hesitant to even bring her name back up into my thoughts. But I couldn't kid myself any longer; she was there all along, whether I liked it or not. She's always been that way. Stubborn, wanting to get noticed, outgoing. Even if she wasn't in the room.

As my pain numbed and I brought myself to actually live normally again, I thought it alright to think about her. I wanted too. So why shouldn't I?

I've been going to school for awhile now, but I haven't seen her once. She was in one of my classes, but now she's not even there. Either she isn't in school period, or she just transferred out of all my classes. But that didn't sound like Keely, so I puzzled over this a lot.

The one thing to do if I wanted to find out was talk to her sister Yazmin, whom I know was still in school. I wasn't going to ask my brothers; no chance in hell. But the bad part was Keely's sisters scared me more than my own brothers did. And who knows how Yazmin would act upon seeing me?

I didn't know any of Yazmin's classes except that she worked in the library. That was my only chance. I thought about this a lot; even stood outside the library door, debating in my mind whether I should go in or not. But the thing was I didn't want to look desperate. And I didn't want to look like I cared. Because I didn't.

So I've been living my days just wondering, just curious. I mean, who wouldn't be? Keely straight up disappeared; I just wanted to know if she was ok. Actually, I couldn't care less, but I was still curious. No harm in that...

I resolved that she went back to her little snitch job. Spying on other people; seducing other guys.

That's what she does, and that's probably what she likes to do. Right?

One day I got a letter in my locker. This reminded me of something, however memories were long gone in me. For some reason my mind denied them now, but I didn't mind. I was better off this way. Without memories.

The letter was from Loz. He invited me to come over to Cloud's place for a drink and a chat. I was tempted to go; Loz was different than Yazoo. He was milder. Cloud also may be nice to talk too...if he, of course, decides to talk at all. But I was afraid they would trick me into that whole experiment again. And I didn't want to talk about that, or go through a lecture on it.

I threw the letter into a trash can on my way to class. If Loz wanted to help me, he should come up to me and try. And if it's the kind of help Yazoo is offering, I want no part of it.

♡♡

I was reading a book for class in my living room. It was very gothic, and misery based. It was loaded with intrigue and horror, and frankly, I liked it. I've been reading it all day non-stop.

I was pretty distracted. I didn't hear any sound, didn't feel anything but anticipation, but that was for the main character in the novel. Suddenly I heard footsteps and I looked up with a start.

Loz walked on in, a concentrated look on his face. He was looking around.

"Loz," I said, still a bit dumbfounded that he suddenly showed up out of nowhere. "What's going on?"

"How you doin' little bro?" Loz asked me with a slow smirk. He walked over to me, but looked over his shoulder once or twice.

"Are you being followed?" I wondered, setting my book down and standing up.

"Nah. Just a bit zoned out. I haven't been here in awhile." Loz walked back and forth, and he seemed to scan every inch of the room.

"If you're looking for Father, he's not here," I told him. I don't know why Loz would be looking for Father anyway though.

"No, no, no," Loz said slowly, his eyes looking up in thought. I was curious as hell to know what on earth he was doing and what was going on in his mind.

"We're not looking for _him_."

My heart beat slowed yet beat faster than normal at the same time. "_We_?" I repeated.

"Yeah, yeah," Loz replied and started making for Yazoo's old bedroom.

"Loz, stop!" I cried and pulled his arm. He swung it away from my grasp. "What are you looking for? I can help you," I told him frantically, even though I shouldn't of have made that promise. I just wanted to know what he was up too.

"That would be good. We sure do need your help," A different voice said behind me. I spun around to find Yazoo glaring at me with fixed concentration. He had a rope in his hand.

_What the hell?_, I thought shrilly. _What's going on here?_

"Yazoo, what-," I started but then I saw two more people come out from behind him. Yazmin, with an emotionless expression. And Keely...with her eyes downcast, looking as if she had a particular interest in how her boot scuffed the ground. I stared at her, but she was looking down the whole time.

"Calm yourself little brother," Yazoo spoke gently, as if I was some mentally deranged person who'd explode into attacks any second. Well, perhaps I was. I wanted too.

"Calm myself? You guys are here for Mother aren't you! No! _No_! You're not taking her!" I cried shrilly and ran away from Loz, but it was too late. He grabbed my arms and secured them tight against my back so I wouldn't run.

I struggled and tried kicking at him but it was no use. I began to cry because this was the most horrifying thing I could uphold; my brothers turning against me...

"It wouldn't be in your room, right Yazoo?" Loz asked Yazoo, ignoring me and my cries.

"No, of course not. Its gotta be in his room," Yazoo replied and headed towards my room.

"It's not there! I don't know where Mother is! Father hid her! Please believe me!" I cried at Yazoo, but he wasn't listening. Nobody was listening. And I wondered why I was helping them in the first place. With that realization in mind, I kept quiet and just continued crying silently. I stopped struggling and Loz held me up straight.

"I'm not going to hurt you little brother. I never would," Loz told me.

I didn't say anything and just watched the ground miserably.

"I'll look somewhere else," Yazmin spoke up to no one in particular. I looked up then and caught Keely's stare. She was looking at me sadly, and she looked alone and forgotten just standing there. Well good for her. She was getting a taste of her own medicine. I lowered my eyes and stopped crying.

Yazoo came back, not looking happy. He walked up to me and pulled me up by the collar of my shirt. "Where is she?" He demanded.

"I told you," I hissed through gritted teeth. "_I don't know_."

"Yazoo, please! Put him down!" I heard Keely cry out.

Yazoo lowered me reluctantly, and glared me down. "Please Kadaj. Tell us. We're not going to hurt you!" He snapped.

"I'm not afraid of pain, Yazoo. I'm quite used to it. And I'm telling you for the last time! I don't know where Mother is!" I cried at him.

"He doesn't know," Keely muttered to Yazoo, assuring him. Yazoo looked at her and sighed. "Do you have an idea?" He asked me, trying to sound calm.

I grew silent with panic. Yazoo looked at me questioningly but then he didn't have any time to answer or ask. A long sword suddenly shoved at him, and pushed him off.

Yazoo cried out, and Yazmin, just returning from her search, screamed out in fright. I breathed louder in fright and felt Loz trembled behind me.

Father stepped up, stabbing his sword into the ground, scowling at us all. "All of you," He snarled. "Leave my house!"

"No!" Yazoo got back up, releasing himself from Yazmin's arms. "We're looking for Mother. And we're not leaving until we have her."

Sephiroth sneered. "She's mine. You'll never have her. Now leave, before I kill all of you."

However ridiculous that sounded, we all shook with fright. We all knew he'd do it.

"Yazoo, let's just leave," I heard Yazmin hiss. Yazoo ignored her and stepped up to Father. I began to cry a little now, because I was sure Yazoo was going to die now.

"Hand her over," Yazoo ordered.

Sephiroth grasped the handle of his sword. I saw with a flash it swoop out of the ground; little splinters of wood flying with it. It swung out. It headed towards Yazoo. "You're dead, you little traitor."

If I blinked I would have missed it. Out of nowhere another sword emerged; a much bigger one, wider, heavier...

Cloud had burst through the door, his own sword already aimed at Father. In a quick speed that would've been any slower, he blocked Father's swing and saved Yazoo from the second of death.

"No."

Yazoo was white and trembling, but still had that determined expression on his face. He backed off for Cloud, and rejoined Yazmin and Keely on the other side of the room.

"No," Cloud repeated, glaring at Father as he pushed his sword farther and farther down towards him, until Father was almost bending in two over the ground.

"You fool," Father snarled with a gasp of breath. Finally he fell, and Cloud's sword swung swiftly to point itself right at his face.

"Tell us where Jenova resides," Cloud demanded with a cold expression played across his face.

I watched with fright and anticipation. I almost felt like plugging my ears. I haven't heard anyone call Mother by her real name in a long time...

"No," Father replied simply, without the slightest note of fear in his voice. "Go ahead and kill me but I'll never tell."

Cloud stared at him coldly still, and didn't utter a response. Instead, quick as lighting he pushed his sword sideways against Sephiroth and pinned him against the wall. "Yazoo," Cloud suddenly spoke up. "Search the whole house."

Yazoo got up, not bothering to tell Cloud he's already tried. Besides, he and I both knew there was one place he hadn't looked yet. As if reading my mind, Yazoo came towards me and pulled me along with him by the collar of my shirt. "Show me," He muttered.

I didn't bother telling him I didn't know again. I simply pointed at Father's room without a word; with that Yazoo dropped me on the ground and I stayed like that, on all fours.

I heard somebody crawl over to me and I heard Keely's voice in my ear. "Are you ok?"

I looked up half way and met her gaze. "Do you really have the nerve to ask that question?" I wondered, not really meaning to sound quite as nasty as I did. I watched her look taken aback, and judging from my reaction she concluded that it was best not to bother me anymore. She retreated back towards her sister and wouldn't look at me.

I wanted to apologize but I was more afraid for Father and my brothers at the moment. I wondered why Cloud hesitated to kill Father, even though I wished with all my heart he wouldn't.

Yazoo chopped down Father's door with Father's sword; Loz helped by finally blasting it open with his fists. They stepped in and came back awhile later, carrying something that was hidden underneath a cloth.

"Is that it?" Cloud asked, not bothering to look. He was still holding Father down.

"Yes," Yazoo replied.

Yazoo and Loz disappeared outside, without a word to me or anyone else. Yazmin got up, holding Keely's hand and urging her forward. Keely shook her head and Yazmin looked at her worriedly. Finally though, Yazmin left and Keely stood there for a moment, watching Father and Cloud just as I was.

Cloud was still holding him down, and the two were glaring at each other something fierce. The silence only made it worse.

Keely then turned to me, her eyes glinting from unreleased tears. She walked over and helped me up, her eyes not leaving me the whole time.

"Will you come with us?" She asked softly. I almost didn't catch what she said.

"But what about Father?" I wondered more to myself than to her.

"There's nothing you can for him now." Keely took hold of my hand, and gripped it with both of hers. "Please come with me," She said. "I've missed you."

As I stared at my hand, being cradled in Keely's, I scolded my mind for being blank at the most important moment of its need. All I could think about was how I've been waiting to hear those words for a long time now. I didn't, and couldn't, remember things that were more important. Nothing, no little voice, no warning, came to me telling if this was wrong or right. No impulse, forcing me to do something I might not approve. Just feeling. Feeling was there, and it acted for me.

I tightened my grip on one of her hands, and her other one fell lightly at her side. We stood there holding hands as I tried to make up my mind. But I couldn't make up my mind. But I could however, make up the direction of my heart.

"I...I will...," I forced the words out of my mouth. I would have preferred not to saying anything.

Keely's pale pink lips formed into an exquisite smile. "You may not forgive me. But you _can_ trust me...now," She said, swinging my hand with hers.

I didn't reply, and without looking back I walked out of that house. It wasn't my house. It was just a house. That didn't belong to me.

Keely followed me, then lead me to where everyone else was. They were in a car, awaiting our arrival. When I came near I saw through the blinding sunlight that Yazoo was smiling at me. "Hop on in little brother. Your new life awaits."

I just gave him a confused look. Keely lead me into the back of the car; it was a rather large van I've never seen before.

It was just us in the back. Well, us and Mother. Shielded by the crime done against her with that cloth.

Keely kept smiling at me and seemed not to acknowledge Mother's presence. "I'll explain everything. And soon, you'll understand. Don't have any regrets. You're doing the right thing," Keely told me.

I just nodded, and preferred to look out the window rather than at her. I'll have plenty of time to look at her later. For now, I wanted to view the outside world one last time.

♡♡

I never found out what happened to Cloud, or Father. Or what happened between them. Hopefully I'll know one day.

I've takena big leap from the present to the future. It used to be Yazoo, Loz, Father, and me. Then for awhile it was just Keely and I. Then, for a longer while, it was just me. Finally, it's me and Keely again, except with all my brothers too. It was everyone all together. How I wished it to be, a long time ago. Though, I had wanted to include Father. However, any thought of him was banished from my mind. And this, I chose on my own accord. I haven't been brainwashed...yet.

I'm not sure if I even will get brainwashed. I wonder if I'll know when it's happening. I wonder if it's happening right now, or if it already has taken its toll on me. I wonder why I labeled brain washing bad in the first place. Everyone else seems so happy. Don't I deserve a chance of being happy again? And I concluded that the only chance of that happening, was if I forgot about Father all together.

I'll still miss him at times. I'm sure. He's been with me almost all my life. But as he says, you're supposed to stay away from bad people. And, considering his rules, he's a bad person alright. I think I gave up on him a long time ago, without knowing it. I know this because I don't feel half as bad as I should by leaving him behind. I take this as a sign, and I'm on my way to accepting my life without him.

As for Mother...I'm not quite so sure. She hasn't been talking to me, so I wouldn't know. All this trauma probably silenced her. I wonder if she'll ever talk to me again. I wonder if this is her punishment on me, for turning my back on her. For letting her get taken away.

I vowed not to care what she thinks, or what Father thinks. I may even not follow what Keely thinks either. Because, I have vowed, just like I should have done a long time ago, to make my own side. I make my own decisions. I'm going to take a full lead on my own life.

I looked out the window. The park, the school, and many buildings passed by in a blur. It's like they don't even matter, at this speed. They're just a blur, right? I didn't know where I was going, though I had a faint idea. I didn't care though. Anything where I could have my brothers for back up, and Keely with it, ought to be good. That's what I think. And what I think, is the only thing that matters now.

_I'm going to take a full lead on my life now_, I thought casually, yet triumphantly. I looked over at Keely. She was messing with the bow in her hair. When she noticed me looking, she blushed and laughed.

"What?" She wondered.

"Nothing," I replied, and gave her a small smile back. I might be taking a full lead on my life now...but who said I had to do it alone?

* * *

**A/N**: Hey everyone! As this is the last chapter, I would like to take a little time off your reading to fully thank you on all the wonderful reviews I've gotten. Thanks so much! They are what mostly keeps me going. I also would like to apologize for the unexpected turn of plot line. Originally, as you can tell by the title, this was just going to be a story about Kadaj going to high school and getting bullied on being Emo. And, his family gave him some trouble too. To think, that it all originated out of a day dream I had when I was in the car. It was a silly little day dream, and I just so happened to be listening to "Crawling" by Linkin Park. While I was listening, I couldn't help concluding that for some reason their songs remind me of Kadaj, and I pictured how Emo Kadaj could be. My day dream involved him going up to show and tell, and basically giving off a concert for his class mates, singing with his brothers "Crawling" and other such songs that reminded me of him. I just laughed to myself, and to my friends when I told them the idea. No big deal, I mean, I have freaky daydreams all the time. Trust me.

But the idea wouldn't leave my head. So, being bored, I randomly decided to start off the Emo story. I swear, I had NO idea it was going to actually be continued, much less have more success than all my other stories put together! Anyway, the whole point of sharing that with you, is that the main point of the whole thing was to see Kadaj Emo. But...it'd get boring with just that...and so I just had to throw in some female characters and some drama. I really couldn't help it. Keely, Yazmin, and Lucy are actually characters I created a long time ago before I even started the Kadaj Emo story. I planned to write a fan fiction all about them, and allthat jazz. But I didn't have a good plot line yet so I put them off to the side for awhile. I couldn't resist and used this Kadaj story to finally bring them out, and I think it turned out pretty good. However, this story doesn't show the Jenova Sisters' full potential...so maybe I finally will start that story...one day.

So I accidentally added this whole complicated plot line I can't go back on now. It's actually very good, and by all means fun to write, and I can't wait until it's wholly completed. But...it didn't fit the prior ideas to this story in the first place! I thought, "Oh well, deal with it," so I hope you guys don't mind. I hope this whole mess with Shin-Ra and Mother and Experiments didn't over all turn the story around completely. Instead of Kadaj being just Emo, I figured adding this new drama would make it better. And I swear, it'll get better! Oh, so much better...(-Can't wait to type up more stuff-) Yes...indeed. From that little hint you all know what's coming...

On that note, yes, there _will_ be a sequel. I think I'm more excited than the readers, haha. And why you ask? Because I full on planned the sequel's plot line all throughout Kadaj: Emo Chronicles, before I even finished it. The sequel will be lots more intense, disturbing, miserable, and over all better than the first story. The only thing is, that it won't really regard back to the whole "Emo" thing. Well, it will in a certain way...in a...mentally deranged sort of way...I think...hehe. But I hope that's alright. I'm sure Kadaj will still be Emo no matter what he goes through, haha.

So stay tuned for that, if you liked the first story. Once again, thanks for all the reviews, and I hope even more fame comes to the sequel. Love to you all!


	8. Note

Note:

Hey everyone! Once again I appreciate all the reviews I've gotten. As in some of the reviews, you guys told me you were excited for the sequel. It's finally up and you can find it on my author's profile or whatever. I hope you like it, and review just as much as you did for this one. Happy reading!

Love Princess


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